Fat versus Skinny

[Emerald]

Personality is absolutely paramount to me finding anyone attractive. It doesn't matter how physically attractive someone is to me, if they are not a nice person or have a horrid personality I will automatically see them as very unattractive. I've met people who were extremely good looking, almost model material, but when they opened their mouth and I realised exactly how shallow and nasty they were there looks in my eyes dropped dramatically. I've also known people who were rather plain and slightly overweight but they were some of the nicest and most interesting/intelligent people I've met so I actually found them physically more attractive as well. Honestly looks and body type mean absolutely nothing to me. My Husband is very good looking and he trains as an amateur boxer so he's also very toned and fit, but that's not why I am attracted to him, it's his personality, the way he moves, his passion for things, the way he holds himself, his presence, the way he thinks and so on...the looks and body are just like a bonus but not what actually equates to attraction for me. One of my previous partners (actually my Defacto or Common Law partner for over 5 years) was a gawky, skinny, nerdy looking guy with sticking out ears, a bad haircut and cystic acne. His skin cleared up with medication, he got a better haircut and then gained 40 or so pounds and became quite overweight, but it didn't make any difference to me because he was a sweet and decent person and that was far more important to me than what he looked like. I can honestly say if my husband was severely disfigured in an accident tommorow I would find him no less attractive than what I do right now, beauty is only skin deep after all.

[Rae Ven Rae]

I think there alot of factors to our current state of obesity -- stress -- concentration on attaining wealth, -- we used to be hunter gatherers -- now most of us sit in a cubicle all day -- and lets say, a woman with three kids, and unspoortive husband is also hypothyroid (it is more prevalent than you think -- my doctor said alot of women "blow out" their thyroids after pregnancy, which is why so many have kids have a hard time getting it off). She won't have the energy, money, time or ability to hit a gym -- I think it is safe to say that we need to promote healthier life styles, but lets understand the root causes too and address them all, not just one. Sure there are some lazy fucks out there who won't help themselves out, but for many, its not just about self control. I think some peoples over eating could have a chemical imblaance, abnormal physiological reaction, because, let's face it, it just isn't normal to over eat to the extent where you gain 700 pounds, I don't care how lazy you are.

It's some kind of malady and I know one day science will porve me right.

As I said, just as some people are born naturally thin, I am sure the opposite is true.

Villifying a person, even if it self esteem related -- won't help --it adds to the problem.

I think education is the key -- that and the ability to motivate others to do what is good for them ..

But we won't be able to help them all and that's just the way it goes...

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Rae Ven Rae

Ophelia --I feel the same way and it is because even though we are not fat we don't see enough women like us heralded as beautiful.

No, no...That's the problem...I do have that look...what I meant was, even though I'm what a lot of people would consider a 10, it's not what I want. I want to be lace thin, delicate, and tiny. I'd lose the boobs, the hips...it's a weird psychological thing.

[Methadrine]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

No, no...That's the problem...I do have that look...what I meant was, even though I'm what a lot of people would consider a 10, it's not what I want. I want to be lace thin, delicate, and tiny. I'd lose the boobs, the hips...it's a weird psychological thing.

You know, I dated a girl who was a 10 to and she had the same "view" of that as you. Maybe there are such a thing as 'too pretty'?

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Methadrine

You know, I dated a girl who was a 10 to and she had the same "view" of that as you. Maybe there are such a thing as 'too pretty'?

Eh. It balances off how emotionally off balance I am? Maybe it's nature's way of ensuring a mate for me, hah.

[Rae Ven Rae]

Wow...your body image most times, are first shaped in the home -- maybe you will never feel quite good enough for another reason -- by the by -- you got more pictures on this thing *wink, wink*

*High fives Emerald* Damn straight cookie.

Funny -- my hubby is short -- I mean real short. Five one to be exact. I am five three. I married a short, white man. LOL

He was also blond.

I like brunettes

But damn if he isn't the most sexy beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on!!!!

[Underwater Ophelia]

That's good. I actually prefer dark mysterious looking guys, and my current lovah is a pale, strawberryblonde haired, freckled Irish dude.

And if you were asking me about pictures, no, I don't have a lot of good pictures.

[Rae Ven Rae]

*snaps fingers*

Doh!

LOL

Funny too, but I think we all have certain physical tastes, but as we mature and broaden our palettes, we become attracted to just "beings"...

[BLEED REBELION!!!]

I like tall lanky guys but not super thin… Sid vicious before he got all cracked out would be ideal…. although for guys I have a wide spectrum of what is atractive

For a woman I prefer her to have curves……I like a girl some hips and ass. I think shakira and Beyonce are very nice looking….. I don’t like SUPER ANOREXIC thin………
I don’t mind if the girl is petite as long as its her natural build..

I weigh 120 pounds im 5 ft 3 in tall. I have hips and an ass I have c cup breast and I’m in shape. In the media I would be considered fat….But next to the average person im considered in excellent shape.
Im in shape I have abs I eat right and it annoys the hell outa me that im expected to be skinnier…….I sent that picture to of the really skinny chick that someone posted above to allot of my male friends. All of them said the would never date her……..*shudders

I like my body I think its nice I look good in a bikini * toots own horn…..
From my experience guys (at least in my culture) prefer a girl with curve.


Have any of you watched America next tom model? there was a girl on there named Anchal and she was my idea of an awesome body..

[Underwater Ophelia]

Oh, definitely. He was just what I was looking for in a person.

[psyches_reflection]

I'm going to curb the urge to rant against the cult of skinny, but if I lapse please forgive me.

I'm a big girl, hovering somewhere between curvy and plump, and have only now (at the age of 21) started to accept my body as being acceptable. I feel in recent years the emphasis is placed on size and not well-being, even amongst some members of the medical profession - an example of this comes from my early teens.

When I was about fourteen, we had some kind of mandatory health-check carried out in school. A bunch of NHS health-worker types came in, and everyone was given an individual interview where they were weighed, their height measured, and were asked questions about their diet, home life, activity levels and sexual activity.

During my interview, I explained that I was a vegetarian, ate a balanced diet, didn't smoke or use drugs, and that on top of the mandatory PE activity I also walked everywhere and felt reasonably fit. Her verdict was that, at 11 stone and 5'3, that I was clearly lying and was "incredibly fat". My friend, who was two inches taller and skinny as a whippet, but admitted to taking no additional exercise, eating junk and smoking, was praised for her good health, and told to "cut down on the smoking a bit". To this day, it still makes me incredibly angry.

[Rae Ven Rae]

I know black men, Hispanic men and Indian men, for the most part, like curves -- not sure where the whole anorexic thin is hot thing comes from.

My hypothesis, is that thinner women are sort of de-sexualized ( no ass no hips no breasts) so they can sell a product a lot better in the mind of marketing types -- you're not looking so much at the girl as you are the product.

Just look at underwear ads -- many might think it obscene to see a girl with a lot of gathunk-gathunk in the trunk on the tube -- but a thin girl has what I call a "harmless sexuality..."

Also, female sexuality is supposedly synonymous with not being credible, as most think a sexual woman is a ditz, so manufacturers would rather have Winona Ryder hawk a product before Pamela Anderson, unless she was selling dildo's...

[Cappinator]

Big girls are beautiful. Thin girls are beautiful. All girls are beautiful.

[BLEED REBELION!!!]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=cnqLBxqC7Vg

Anchal is in this video she is the Indian girl....Im still looking for a better vid or pics...but this gives the idea...

What do you guys think ofher body? I would date some one thicker than her but i just think she is very beautiful..

[Minyaliel]

The skinny thing, if I remember correctly, is based in a trend started by a model called Twiggy in the sixties, and has since been exaggerated to a point where it's getting severely gross...

[DeathChii]

I just don't like how they pin anorexia on the media, when obesety is A HUGE health concern which is taking over 60% of America.

[Rae Ven Rae]

amen and amen on all counts!

[Tismine]

Originally Posted by Rae Ven Rae

I know black men, Hispanic men and Indian men, for the most part, like curves -- not sure where the whole anorexic thin is hot thing comes from.

Where on Earth did you hear someone saying that "anorexia is hot"?

[BLEED REBELION!!!]

Obesity is caused by allot of things but I tend to say that "MCDonalds is evil it'll give you cancer!!"

[MollyMac]

The thin thing is a First World thing, for the most part. You uphold a standard that os more difficult as beauty. In poor countries, greater weight is an indication of wealth, and so meatier bodies are more attractive. We in the US have plenty of food, and the control to say no is an indication of power. And so, you can surmise that personal abundance in a land of little; or personal deprivation in a land of plenty are indicators of power and attractiveness.

Anorexia is dying of thirst in the rain.

[Lady_Lacrimosa_Umbrae]

It really annoys me how important it is to society. I'm not fat nor skinny, but I have a bit of a problem finding shirts because my shoulders are a bit broad for a woman (I mean, for what the image of the ideal anorexic model is). I have a lot of self-steem and no problem about it, but everytime that I am trying clothes that don't fit me because of that, I think about how many girls (and boys!) are having an awful time and worrying until they get psycological problems for something as stupid as that. There are health issues concerning being too skinny or too fat, but as long as you're healthy, it's ok.

And I agree with what some people have said: sometimes it's more about self-confidence, about the way you carry yourself around, rather than the actual looks.

[Tismine]

Originally Posted by DeathChii

I just don't like how they pin anorexia on the media, when obesety is A HUGE health concern which is taking over 60% of America.

Most celebrities and models are thin. They are praised for their beauty by tabloids, so it is ingrained in the heads of little girls that skinny=beautiful.
And that never goes away.
They don't give a crap about obesity anymore.
Nowadays, we are encouraged to "embrace out body-types", and this leads to being comfortable with obesity.
They are trying to desensitize us to it, even going so far as to call "plus-sizes" "vanity-sizes."

[Crying_Crimson_Tears]

I know they are these two women in the industry who are big but they carry it well.

Monique and Queen Latifa.

They're big, and they're beautiful. And they are DAMN proud of it. They carry that message that ALL women are beautiful. Despite their size. And I love that!!!

I just wish I felt comfortable in my own skin like they do.

[Rae Ven Rae]

Originally Posted by MollyMac

The thin thing is a First World thing, for the most part. You uphold a standard that os more difficult as beauty. In poor countries, greater weight is an indication of wealth, and so meatier bodies are more attractive. We in the US have plenty of food, and the control to say no is an indication of power. And so, you can surmise that personal abundance in a land of little; or personal deprivation in a land of plenty are indicators of power and attractiveness.

Anorexia is dying of thirst in the rain.

That was a awesome point! Also Psyche is a case in point of what I was saying earlier -- she did everything right, and people still looked at her as lazy big girl, which was just astoundingly prejudicial!

I am sorry you had to go through that dear...

[MollyMac]

Don't forget Cameron Manheim. But I'm more of a fan of Jennifer Tilly, America Ferrara, Scarlett Johannsen, Christina Ricci- they are obviously healthy, and that is killer.

Men face similar issues- ya gotta be buff, boys. Gotta have the six pack... and the pressure can be as great- about 10% of anorexics are men, and that is not counting steroid usage.