Teen Pregnancy

[Nevan]

Raggedyanne I have no advice for you but I wish you best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

[korinna5555]

Originally Posted by raggedyanne

Miss Cogs, I wish luck to the girl at your school. L'Oiseau Noir, lol, so true.

Well, the tests came out positive. My boyfriend and I are trying to figure out what to do and how to tell my parents. Abortion always seems like more of an option when you aren't quite sure. I'm really freaked out and confused right now. I talked to the pastor of the church I sometimes go to (I may not be religious, but the guy's awesome) and he's going to help me tell my parents. I really don't know what to do right now.

I know several people who went through abortions, and I know that all of them regret it. If that's what you need to do, I won't talk you out of it. Just remember that there ARE many other options.
If you want to talk, send me a PM, or I can give you my MSN.
*huggles*

[MollyMac]

Raggedy, good call in talking to your pastor, first of all. You are very fortunate to have someone you can talk to.

Mainly, hold off on making any decisions right now, don't dwell or over-think. Not until the reality sinks in, at least. Then your head will be clearer. I won't steer you into any direction. You ultimately know what you want right now, and I trust that you have thought about what you want for the future. Now, throw all that out the window and look at now and the future with new eyes- what will cause the least harm? What will you be able to live with?

It is funny how you see the world one way, and then something happens so fast, and all of a sudden you are seeing it as a completely different person.

I wish the best to you, that your thoughts become clearer and clearer, that the talk goes well, and that you will come to a conclusion that best fits.

[Solumina]

Raggedyanne: If you can, you should try to talk to a therapist if you are considering getting an abortion (they are never happy things but I do know people who are glad that they got one but every one of those people went through counseling both before and after the procedure). Adoption and fostering are also viable choices but they can also have some major emotional repercussions so once again I would urge you to talk to professional, and remember that you have to think about the strain that carrying a child will have on your body (talk to your mother to see if there are any hereditary conditions that could cause any sort of complications as those heath risks could have a major impact on your decision).

Whatever you decide I wish you the best.

[raggedyanne]

You guys are awesome! Thanks for the support and the links. I'm definitely considering keeping the baby. My boyfriend is being amazing supportive and while he's freaking out majorly inside, he's made it clear that he loves and supports me no matter my choice. I have a few years of schooling left and am very fortunate to live within driving distance of San Francisco State. I'll be able to take classes there and at the local community college. We're going to talk to his therapist, then tell our respective families together. (That way I can hide behind him when they start throwing knives ;P) There's also a good independant study program at my high school. My family is fairly well off, so I'm very fortunate that my child will have everything it needs to grow up healthy and happy. My boyfriend had a pretty shitty example for a dad, and it's strange to see him so determined to NOT be like his father, to be responsible and there for me. I'm still scared and craving calamari, but things are actually quite stable, considering the circumstances.

[korinna5555]

I say keep the baby. If your boyfriend is handling things this well.. he's a keeper, too.
I was craving things right away, too.. haha.
My MSN is belaundead5 @ hot mail. com

[raggedyanne]

LOlz. We got into a bit of an argument over names. He wants to name the kid Ivan, and I'm willing to compromise by putting is as a middle name but not a first name. I want my child to have a good Finnish name, and he's a bit more traditional. He wants Brianna or Ivan, I want Kaisu or Nielo.

[raggedyanne]

my pastor is pissing me off. He keeps telling me to tell my mother and saying that everyone knows.

[AngelikDemonik]

No, the schools need to teach kids ALL OF THEIR OPTIONS, INCLUDING ABORTION. Ya know why? Because parents won't!

Most teenagers are VERY ill informed about sex. THEY THINK YOU CAN GET PREGNANT FROM A BLOWJOB (which is impossible, seeing as how the digestive track has nothing to do with the reproductive tract, and the stomach acid [HCL] kills sperm on direct contact). Most also don't know that you can get STDs from performing oral sex. They need to know shit to protect themselves, and quite frankly, most parents are too ignorant on these topics to know anything, let alone, pass it along to their children.

Those "wait 'til yer married" programs are shit.

And lastly, abortion is and should be legal. Ya know why? IF YOU DON'T WANT ONE, NO ONE IS GOING TO MAKE YOU HAVE ONE.

[Steppenwolf]

Raggedyanne , whatever is your decision , take care about yourself first ok? I wish with my whole heart all your plans will be exactly as you imagine them right now , but Is more wise to have always a "plan b" and above all never do things you can't undo ....

[Shlindrea]

While I wasn't a pregnant teen, I was barely out of them when I found myself pregnant. I was on the pill, but still ended up pregnant anyway. For me, I believe it was all about having a father that wasn't there emotionally for me and so I found love where I could. It just happened to be with an asswipe who wanted me to have an abortion because he didn't want the responsibility nor did he want somebody else raising his child. Stupid I know. Anyway...flash forward 15 years. (yes I'm that old) I now have a beautiful almost 16 year old daughter (karma is sooo cool) and now he knows what it's like trying to keep guys like him from his own daughter. Her and I talk openly about sex and I make sure she knows just how hard it was to be a single parent, hell it's hard being a married adult and raising kids!!! I've also made sure she knows what's involved as she has helped me on many occasion taking care of her younger siblings when they were infants. I've also made sure she knows that I'll support her no matter what happens in her life and not expect her to go against her beliefs if she should find herself in the same boat that I did. I just pray she's smarter then I was!

'Drea

[korinna5555]

Originally Posted by AngelikDemonik

THEY THINK YOU CAN GET PREGNANT FROM A BLOWJOB

That's how I got pregnant.. haha. But not the way most would think.
Blowjob without condom > Kissing > Eating out
Yeahhhh..
TMI. My apologies.

[CandyKorns]

It's immature, that's for sure! Teenage girl's body's are still developing and yet they have another being inside them trying to develop! There lives are will never be the same after having a baby, their chances of getting a good career is slimmed, and the fact always remains that they had a kid while still in their teen years.

[raggedyanne]

Oh! I did he worst thing ever! I thought I could continue dancing (modern and jazz, along with latin) while pregnant, but we have the one "fall" move where we literally drop to the floor. Today I misjudged it and landed really hard on my stomach, then hip. I went to the nurses and thought I would be fine. But I was with my boyfriend this afternoon and started cramping up really badly, and I think there's some blood! Tomorrow I'm going to the doctors to make sure everything is okay. Ugh. I am such and idiot. My boyfriend told me not to dance, but I just had to be a bitch about it. I'm sorry you guys. you've all been so amazing and helping me out emotionally and with information. I know it's common for women to miscarry in the first two months especially, but I never thought it might happen to me. I'm not shitting you all; I'm not a attention whore. I really am (or was) pregnant and all the emotion and physical shit that that brings. Please pray (or whatever) that my little fall didn't do anything and that my baby is okay. If not, my boyfriend and I will definitely try for another. We may be young, but he was just so ready to be a daddy and me a mom.

[korinna5555]

STAY IN BED, especially if you are spotting bright red. A bit of brown spotting is normal, bright red is bad. If things do take a turn for the worse, know that I am always here for you. Since you are only a few weeks though, things are probably fine. Just take it easy.
Look into raspberry/nettle/alfalfa tea (tones uterus and provides high levels of iron and Vitamin K). Ginger and/or peppermint tea is great for morning sickness.
I know what you mean about trying for another; Justin and I have been considering that, too.

[korinna5555]

Originally Posted by CandyKorns

It's immature, that's for sure! Teenage girl's body's are still developing and yet they have another being inside them trying to develop! There lives are will never be the same after having a baby, their chances of getting a good career is slimmed, and the fact always remains that they had a kid while still in their teen years.

Oh, sod off.. you are a fucking asshole..

[korinna5555]

Oh.. I also wanted to add this:
Raggedy, if you need someone to tell your parents (you had mentioned that your pastor friend was being a butt) I am more than willing to help you out, if you'd like.

[raggedyanne]

Originally Posted by korinna5555

STAY IN BED, especially if you are spotting bright red. A bit of brown spotting is normal, bright red is bad. If things do take a turn for the worse, know that I am always here for you. Since you are only a few weeks though, things are probably fine. Just take it easy.
Look into raspberry/nettle/alfalfa tea (tones uterus and provides high levels of iron and Vitamin K). Ginger and/or peppermint tea is great for morning sickness.
I know what you mean about trying for another; Justin and I have been considering that, too.

Thanks. I'm still really worried.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by korinna5555

Oh, sod off.. you are a fucking asshole..

She's being realistic.

[korinna5555]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

She's being realistic.

I disagree. VERY much.

I don't want to turn this into an argument though.. not on here. This is Anne's thread. If you want to talk/argue/whatever, message me on myspace.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Ok, I will do that.

[raggedyanne]

Okay, I talked to a friend and everything seems normal. Seeing as this is my first and I don't really have a responsible adult who I can ask, I can't thank you all enough for the support. I'm going for a check up monday and telling my mom tuesday. Wish me luck.

[TopHaggardDoll]

Good luck, dear, I hope things turn out for the best.