(taken from
http://www.lavenderpillow.co.uk/Fun_Stuff.html)
Problems only Goths Have
· Trying to get blacks that match after they fade in the wash
· Trying to convince the drunk bloke who is chatting you up that you really are a guy.
· Big hair, small cars
· Airport metal detectors
· Nicknames such as "that gay devil worshipping freak that dyed his hair purple"
· Getting your jewelry tangled in your clothes/hair
· Getting your jewelry tangled in other peoples clothes/hair
· When your pointy toe shoes/boots get caught in the holes in the hem of your skirt.
· Wearing thick black velvet when it's 90 degrees outside
· Accidentally removing someone's nose ring with your spiked bracelet while dancing
· Getting people to look you in the eyes when you talk to them.
· Getting your slave bracelet caught in your fishnets
· Having to reach for the salt with one hand while holding back your sleeve with the other so it doesn't drag in the gravy
· Trying to find your possessions in an all black room
· Trying to get the hair-dye stains out of your towels, sink, floors, doors, ceilings, carpets, pets, furniture, friends.
· Finding a soap powder that gets those blacks blacker
· Having little kids tug on their parent's arm and say, "Look, Mommy, isn't she pretty? I want to look like her!" while the parents grab the child and run away screaming.
· Trying to wash dishes with those flowing sleeves.
· Going out in the winter and having all the metal stuff you are wearing freeze against your exposed skin.
· Getting your skirt caught on: anything and everything
· Lending your eyeliner to a friend and finding out later that he's returned it without mentioning that he completely emptied the entire brand new tube.
· Trying to buy mundane clothes to go job hunting in and not being able to bring yourself to buy anything with enough color.
· The salt stains on the hems of skirts in winter.
· Not being able to climb really small stairs because the pointy toes on your pixie boots stick out past your toes so far that you can't get your actual toes on the steps.
· Trying to stand up, and getting the hooks on your left boot caught in the fishnets on your right leg. And managing to look graceful while extricating yourself.
· Dancing in a corset.
· Attempting to explain Goth to anyone
· Driving in a rather large cloak.
· Having to wash black lipstick off of your neck.
· Having to rush out of bed the moment you wake up just so you can get to the bank before it closes.
· Convincing someone that you are straight even though you are wearing a lace trimmed shirt and makeup.
· Finding that your freshly washed black t-shirt is covered in bits of lint, which while undetectable by the naked eye, show up very well under UV, thereby making you appear to have terminal dandruff.
· Trying to find food you can eat without messing up your lipstick
· Trying to get seated so that the eye that you did just right will be the one facing outward.
· Being unable to decide which rings look best over the black lace gloves
· Trying to ride a bicycle with a long black skirt
· Trying to type with your lace gloves on
· Brushing against walls and having chips fly off because of your spiked bracelet.
· Having to avoid potential self-mutilation after just finishing filing one's nails to a point.
· When it's cold, your nose will be red no matter how much make-up you have on.
· Having to pay £10 for a pack of cocktail cigarettes so that they match your outfit
· Carefully extracting your struggling pet cat, claw by claw from the lap of your best lace skirt
· Trying to look cool using a walking cane when you have two perfectly functional legs.
· Trying to get things out of your trouser pockets while wearing a hand full of large spikey rings
· Ending up going to bed with someone before you are 100% sure what sex they are
· Trying to explain to your grandmother that just because you are wearing a huge cross around your neck, doesn't mean you have become a Catholic
· Having fat ugly people wearing cheap, ill fitting and totaly tasteless clothes which cost £20 from Tescos and makes them look like a lumpy amorphus blob, take the piss out of your outfit, which cost you £800 to put together and makes you look like a goddess.
· Flicking through a magazine or a newspaper with velvet gloves on.
Working around candles with long hair and long flowing sleeves. They look great but are a serious fire hazard. (Thanks Amy).
"Oh bugger, I've just got my bat trapped in the till" (Rose 4/9/2004) It could only happen to a Goth shopkeeper..........
Getting your tongue stud caught in your girlfriends fishnets (Thanks Grant)
Going to the toilet when you are wearing big spikey rings..... Ouch! it makes us wince just thinking about it. (Thanks Alison)
Trying to stop people thinking you are cursing them when you smile.... just because you are wearing black lipstick and a pentagram. (Thanks Sarah)
Not being able to walk down the road without having grrrrreeeeeebooooo shouted out you every 3 flippin seconds
Drying your hair with dangly metal dagger earings/pendants..... metal being a good conductor of electricity really hurts your neck...
Always being deadly paranoid when out wearing black lipstick in case it has got on your teeth. (Thanks Sarah)
I went to a wedding in September and the reception was held in a marquee dumped right in the middle of a damp field. Walking respectfully while trying to extract the heel of your boot that is wedged in the mud is difficult. Also, I had a black outfit to start with and then tried to stay looking respectful with, now, brown boots and skirt hem! (Thanks Gem
Trying to convince people that Goths are not the same as Emos
Trying to convince yourself that Goths are not the same as Emos
Trying to determine whether you are a Goth or an Emo
And before anyone starts emailing us with the 10,000 differences between Goth and Emo.... we really don't care.... (It's all about wearing black, looking cool and upsetting old people isn't it) We stock Goth stuff and Emo stuff. you decide which is which and who you are........
