Fucking Bullshit this is...

[Godslayer Jillian]

I like that opinion is kinda divided instead of seeing just flaming in this thread.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Alarica

Forces kids dont have a choice. They deal with it. My best friend when I was little was a forces brat. Literally over a weekend his parents had to move from Scotland to Germany. He didnt even get time to say goodbye or get peoples addresses. We got in contact again a few years ago and are still great friends, despite our lifestyles being complete opposites. I was uprooted a lot too, and we didnt have the internet then. We had the telephone and pen and paper. If his parents think its for the best, thats their call.

Oh fuck off. It's not their call, the sovereignity of the individual isn't completely expendable at the mercy of parental whims. What they're doing is irrational and unfair, and you're all so eager to get a chance to show off how great you are and put down others that you've overlooked things like you're dissenting arguments being "Well, my friend's friend was uprooted and they didn't like it and it was a distressing time for them, but they're not dead or anything!" Truly inspiring orators you all are.

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

And while that sucks, it's no reason to hate your parents.
People move all the time.

Also, you have no evidence they have no concern for him. The kid is angry, so why would he tell us that his mom said she'd drive him back every summer to see them, or that his dad held him while he cried when he learned he was moving away from his girlfriend?

Also, ever consider that his parents may be desperate? Another thing the kid wouldn't have said, or might not even know, is that his parents might be forced because of money. This is happening in the US now--people are moving to places where it's cheaper to live because our economy is getting fucking scary.

One of my best friends had to move to Kentucky because his family was too poor to keep his house, and he had family to stay with down there.
Maybe this is a similar situation.

Wasn't it you that told me to stop talking in hypotheses? Now you're dredging up a bunch of postulations to attempt to justify your tirade, maybe this is a similar situation, but there's no reason to believe that it is.

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua

But...but...immature teens are so easily provoked. It's hard not to poke them with sticks.

Hey, being an insensitive cunt is not your job, I prefer you when you're the passive occasional-pacifier, you don't make your presence as obvious when you've got that role.

[All Shall Be Judged]

I love how the "you're a kid, you should do as you're told" club are pretending they never acted like brats over something far less significant than disconnection from every non-family related relationship they've ever forged.

Conservatism is the new non-conformity, yo! Shine on you crazy diamonds.

[Tam Li Hua]

*pokes JCC with a stick*

I was a brat, and still am at times.

[blackwater1110]

Very sorry to hear that, Agios. Losing your entire social life and structure in one fell swoop can be very threatening, and sometimes parents can neglect to ask for input from their kids, which is very frustrating, and in that respect your anger is justifiable.

That said, the strained economy at the moment may be one of their reasons for moving, as well, in which case they would just be trying to continue to ensure both their and your survival. As you get older, your resentment for what you consider mistakes on the part of your parents will diminish.

That said, try and make the best of it. Other posters have already touched on how to do this. If you can't convince them to stay, make sure you can keep as much of what you love about Indiana before you go; friends are friends, regardless of distance, and once you are grown you might be able to move back and pick up where you left off, if it sounds like something you really want at that time.

Best of luck to you.

[Alarica]

Originally Posted by JCC

Oh fuck off. It's not their call, the sovereignity of the individual isn't completely expendable at the mercy of parental whims.

Wrong. It IS their call. It is up to them, for whatever reason, to move. Like several people said, money is a big issue at the moment. Stop spitting your dummy out like a spoilt brat. Have your parents done something similar to you, and you want to get it off your chest?

If the OP's parents have a good reason to move, financial issues being one possibility, then it isnt a whim. It is a justifiable reason to move. Maybe 1 of his parents has had an affair and they think moving away will get the marriage back on track, who knows! There are plenty of reasons, and how the fucking hell do you know his parents havent sat and talked for months about the pros and cons of moving their child away? How do you know they arent just as upset, or just as worried about making their child move away and move school and leave his friends behind? In this day and age, atleast he has technology on his side so keeping in touch is instant, as opposed to an agonising week or so wait for letters to pass back and fourth. Yes it's going to be hard to make new friends, and I dont doubt for a moment he's pissed off and upset about having to leave everyone hes close to. That doesnt mean you and he get to sit there slagging off his parents or make it ok for him to wish them the worst.

But then, intelligent as you try to come across, you are still a child yourself, so you are only seeing it from the point of view of the child being ripped from his comfort zone. The parents are always wrong because they often, badly judged or not, will talk about huge life altering changes in the dead of night and not consult their child during the decision making process. Be that having another child, moving away or even where to go on holiday.

[Tam Li Hua]

Y'know, all this talk of having comfort zones for teens goes right over my head; I didn't have one as a teen, since my family was quite dysfunctional and I hated school. :P

Moving away from my family was really the only way to change things for the better, so I guess I just don't see moving as a disaster.

[All Shall Be Judged]

Tam, you're right in pointing out that there may be larger issues for the whole family at stake, but Agios is entitled to be pissed off about this. It may not damage him for life, but it DOES have a huge negative impact on life as he knows it. He's not a brat for resenting this.

[Tam Li Hua]

I never said he was. If you read my first post in this thread, you'll see exactly what my opinion was and has been.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Alarica

Wrong. It IS their call. It is up to them, for whatever reason, to move. Like several people said, money is a big issue at the moment. Stop spitting your dummy out like a spoilt brat. Have your parents done something similar to you, and you want to get it off your chest?

If the OP's parents have a good reason to move, financial issues being one possibility, then it isnt a whim. It is a justifiable reason to move. Maybe 1 of his parents has had an affair and they think moving away will get the marriage back on track, who knows! There are plenty of reasons, and how the fucking hell do you know his parents havent sat and talked for months about the pros and cons of moving their child away? How do you know they arent just as upset, or just as worried about making their child move away and move school and leave his friends behind? In this day and age, atleast he has technology on his side so keeping in touch is instant, as opposed to an agonising week or so wait for letters to pass back and fourth. Yes it's going to be hard to make new friends, and I dont doubt for a moment he's pissed off and upset about having to leave everyone hes close to. That doesnt mean you and he get to sit there slagging off his parents or make it ok for him to wish them the worst.

But then, intelligent as you try to come across, you are still a child yourself, so you are only seeing it from the point of view of the child being ripped from his comfort zone. The parents are always wrong because they often, badly judged or not, will talk about huge life altering changes in the dead of night and not consult their child during the decision making process. Be that having another child, moving away or even where to go on holiday.

It's not their call when they're drastically changing another person's life without even consulting them. Are we implying that this is a fucking four year old child? This guy has his own life, his own friends, his own relationships, his own aspirations, and he is butthurt about having to leave all of that behind because his family have decided to pack up and fuck off somewhere else. He's been extended the offer by someone else to stay exactly where he wants to be, and his parents aren't letting him do that either, so who are the spoilt brats? Him for wanting the happy life that his parents are in pursuit of, or his parents for trying to force him to live theirs? Intelligent as you try to come across, you are still a parent yourself, and I think that you're trying to justify any decision that you have made or will make in the future that drastically affects your child's life without consulting them, and if you expect anyone here to support you in that, I'm afraid that you're only going to find support from the same people that have taken the excuse to harrass this kid in this thread.

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by JCC

Intelligent as you try to come across, you are still a parent yourself

Up until that point, it actually sounded serious.

[All Shall Be Judged]

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua

I never said he was. If you read my first post in this thread, you'll see exactly what my opinion was and has been.

That wasn't a bad post, but the one about poking immature teens with sticks pretty much trivialised the whole issue. Claiming that cursing your parents isn't okay compounded this - what's best for the family isn't necessarily what's best for the individual, and although this may be unavoidable when there are several people to consider, cursing the people screwing up your life is a reasonably harmless outlet. I'll allow it.

[Maxim_Macabre]

Welcome to my world I've moved to five different cities in two different countries and I only just turned 16 I should be whining.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Maxim_Macabre

Welcome to my world I've moved to five different cities in two different countries and I only just turned 16 I should be whining.

"Hey, look at me, I'm coping with a similar situation, aren't you so impressed at how mature I am in comparison to this neanderthal?!"
Not really.

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by JCC

"Hey, look at me, I'm coping with a similar situation, aren't you so impressed at how mature I am in comparison to this neanderthal?!"
Not really.

You sound really passionate about this.

[Tam Li Hua]

Legally, the parents are responsible for this kid. If the parents let the kid live up there by himself, it would not only make them very irresponsible people, but they would be faulted if something bad happened to him.

Despite that, they should have at least given him some time to emotionally and socially to prepare. [I'm assuming that this move is coming rather quickly, like in the next month or so.]

[JCC]

I'm not really passionate about it, but I am pretty bothered, since I've seen the most ridiculous things said so far with the utmost sincerity and it's making me question my faith in humanity.

[Tam Li Hua]

I question humanity all the time. It's a normal state of being human, methinks.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua

I question humanity all the time. It's a normal state of being human, methinks.

You're an idiot though, I'm not going to take life advice from you.

[All Shall Be Judged]

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua

Legally, the parents are responsible for this kid. If the parents let the kid live up there by himself, it would not only make them very irresponsible people, but they would be faulted if something bad happened to him.

It really comes down to how trustworthy his best friend's parents are. If they're not lunatics, his parents should allow this, at least on a trial basis. People need to realise that children aren't an extension of yourself.

[knightmare]

Originally Posted by All Shall Be Judged

People need to realise that children aren't an extension of yourself.

The Selfish Gene's Richard Dawkins would slap you right now.

[Tam Li Hua]

Originally Posted by JCC

You're an idiot though, I'm not going to take life advice from you.

Never said you had to.

*poke poke poke*

Judged: That's a good point; it may do the kid some good to be away from his folks for a while.

I've been wondering lately if the legal adult age should be lowered in this country from [generally] 18 down to 16.

[All Shall Be Judged]

Originally Posted by knightmare

The Selfish Gene's Richard Dawkins would slap you right now.

No, he wouldn't. I saw a documentary a couple of months ago in which he was arguing for altruism as anthropologically viable.

Also, The Selfish Gene is about gene selection, not selfishness as a human characteristic. Please read books before attempting to use them to validate your own dubious wisdom.

[knightmare]

Evolution's concept of survival of the fittest is essentially selfish. Tell me when you see a species of animals sharing their food and shelter with another species. Also, the abundance of inter-species conflict shows the innate selfishness of creatures.
True altruism is incompatible with biological evolution. How do you think the transmission of genetics and genetics selection works? The one who has better genetics to hoard all the resources he can survives, and is able to transmit his genes. Modern humans can afford to be altruistic.

[All Shall Be Judged]

Originally Posted by knightmare

Evolution's concept of survival of the fittest is essentially selfish. Tell me when you see a species of animals sharing their food and shelter with another species. Also, the abundance of inter-species conflict shows the innate selfishness of creatures.
True altruism is incompatible with biological evolution. How do you think the transmission of genetics and genetics selection works? The one who has better genetics to hoard all the resources he can survives, and is able to transmit his genes. Modern humans can afford to be altruistic.

Ignoring the fact that you're applying a GENETICALLY evolutionary concept to this situation (and the fact that you're obviously unable to distinguish between purely physical and humanistic concepts): tell me how Dawkins' book applies to Agios' dilemma. No speculative linking of the two disciplines and fundamentalist conjecture on your part - just tell me the relevance. Go on, prove you've read at least one book in your life. Tell me something that isn't on Wikipedia.