Tell somthing about yourself, that you haven't shared with someone else - Page 18

Metatron · 01-10-2006, 08:13 PM

Look! There's one now! u gud at reeding/righting joyslayer very good

joyslayer · 01-10-2006, 08:15 PM

Umm, I think you forgot what "illiterate" means. Literate means you can read and write. ILLIterate means that you can not read or write.

Metatron · 01-10-2006, 08:19 PM

Wooooops

joyslayer · 01-10-2006, 08:29 PM

Teehee, not you silly! I meant the person who aparently "thinks different."

Metatron · 01-10-2006, 08:32 PM

Shhhhh...be vawy vawy qwiet! I'm huntin' illitewate monkweys...

WolfMoon · 01-10-2006, 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TStone

*gets in line for his lesbian friends*

Can I have an Asian one, and a really hot red-headed Irish one? Pretty please?

Well, I guess that'd be alot better than having a hot-bi-goth chick, huh?

Sanctus Dei · 01-10-2006, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThinkDifferent

Illiterate monkeys are hard to come by. Theres only a few of them left who avoided being exploited into typists for corporations.

Didn't you say you were leaving??
No really...Buh Bye, silly stupid person!!

Something about me... I want a monkey I can come home to battle. Yes.

Metatron · 01-11-2006, 03:08 AM

I don't think he gets it...

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-11-2006, 03:21 AM

Oh well, he's still not as annoying as that Rabbit kid was. Fond memories, Dei, yes?

JuliaGaltic · 01-11-2006, 04:33 PM

I have a **** fantasy... I don't acutally want to be ***** and I haven't shared this with my boyfriend but I'd like to try actually struggling and have him take me by "force".

I'm sure actually being ***** is highly traumatic and I wouldn't wish to actually experience it and I'm so sorry for anyone who has.

The thought of that REALLY turns me on and always has... I know it's pretty sick but it says to post something I've never shared with anyone else so here you go.

joyslayer · 01-11-2006, 08:09 PM

Yes, the fantasy is soo much better than the reality.

mortalitas incomitatus · 01-11-2006, 08:33 PM

i've always wanted another threesome but none of my men will share me!
assholes!

Sanctus Dei · 01-11-2006, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blushing Heliophobe

Oh well, he's still not as annoying as that Rabbit kid was. Fond memories, Dei, yes?

Ahh.. yeah Rabbit was a special kid... real, real special.

If only I had a gun...

Julia: I have that same fantasy, my love wants to play it out for me but.. I don't know if I'd really feel the same about it during. So, for the moment I keep it buried in my head and just let him dominate me a little if the need arises.

AlKilyu · 01-11-2006, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Santarea

A r*** fantasy is not sick. It's only sick if it's real.

My question on that is: What kind of a man does that? I am pretty accepting that other people's tastes might not be the same as my own yet it doesn't make them wrong for liking something I don't, but r*** fantasies are beyond my understanding.

Even if it is mutual, the idea, and I don't think any man should be encouraged to think that way. I'm not dissing you in any way shape or form Santarea, but being someone who dedicates a good chunk of his life to protecting women, it bothers me that some women roleplay that.

Just something I won't and never want to understand.

WolfMoon · 01-11-2006, 10:29 PM

It's actually alot like the vampire fantasy, Al. Women can let themselves go because they're being 'overpowered'. They don't have to feel guilt or something.

I don't have r*** fantasies, I'd rather be ravished!

Sanctus Dei · 01-11-2006, 10:34 PM

It has to do with a Neanderthal like need to be entirely dominated to the highest degree. It has little to do with the violent aspect of the act.. more so the idea that your man could completely control you, it may sound crazy but knowing he is that strong is a comfort and provides a safe feeling for my psyche.

That... and I'm totally a sadist.

WolfMoon · 01-11-2006, 10:45 PM

You mean masochist.

Sadist ~ Likes giving pain

Masochist ~ Likes recieving pain

Sanctus Dei · 01-11-2006, 11:04 PM

Opps... I meant to say both. I'm typing tired right now.

WolfMoon · 01-11-2006, 11:08 PM

It's cool.

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-11-2006, 11:41 PM

I don't think **** fantasies are sick. The real deal is without a doubt disgusting. But the point of a **** fantasy is to be dominated absolutely in the most personal way imaginable. What also makes it special is that most people do not understand a fantasy like that, so when you actually do get to try it or even broach the idea to a partner it feels like you have shown them a side of you that most people wouldn't understand.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-12-2006, 11:48 AM

I was going to stay out of this one. However, everyone else has been Sharey Sharing these days so I'm joining the fray.

I was Eleven years old when I was vaginally r a p e d by my Uncle. He and my Aunt spent the next five days doing things to me that I will not repeat here. Very clear are the details of what he did to me when he had me alone, thankfully the later details aren't as clear. I am grateful for that small boon.

That being said, for as long as I can remember being aware of my sexual desire, I fantasized about 'role-playing' a r a p e scene. Something about it excited me deeply.

Being r a p e d and then proceeding to fantasize about r a p e really fucks with your head after awhile. I did NOT enjoy what he did to me, or what she did to me. Nothing about that experience was positive.

Not a damn thing.

So for many years I walked around thinking I was twisted beyond repair for having these fantasies about something so Sick and Soul Scarring.

One day not all that long ago, I talked to a woman who had worked as a Crisis Counselor for abused women. The subject of R A P E Fantasies came up, and shamefully I confessed my dark secret.

She explained to me that when women who have been forcibly R A P E D, fantasize about R A P E, it's very natural and normal. Here's why.

When a woman who has been R A P E D can CHOOSE to reinact those horrific moments in a POSITIVE way with THEIR consent, with someone THEY trust, they can begin to heal and let go of alot of their pain. THEY are in control in these role-play type situations, receiving pleasure instead of debasement. Receiving 'Love" in the act instead of Hate. This is only possible when there is a deep Trust and Understanding on the Male's part.

Hearing it explained that way to me, released years of shame I had felt on having such fantasies. It made alot more sense than it did to me previously. I no longer felt dirty or twisted about these desires.

Being R A P E D isn't really about being Fucked.

It's about taking and breaking a woman.
FORCING her to submit to your will.
It's about CONTROL.
It's about making you feel Helpless and Powerless and Weak.

When you can take those elements away from the experience, and replace them with Trust and Passion and Pleasure that YOU the woman are in control of, you can begin to Heal and let go and RECLAIM that which was taking from you against your will.

I for one will never feel shame again for being aroused by these things.

No, I am not saying "R A P E Roleplay" heals every scar I feel. Nor am I saying this type of 'Play' works well for every R A P E victim.

But I have found healing and a wonderful sense of Power in the experience.

My 1.8 cents on the subject.

.

01-12-2006, 11:55 AM

Oh my God, E_P_S. That's unbelievable. I see all that you have gone/are going through and just instills my faith that you are one strong woman. You truly are an example.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-12-2006, 12:05 PM

Thank you Beautiful..

I don't talk or really even think about these things very much anymore..

Some people wear their tragedies as a Badge and carry around a flag proclaiming that this or that terrible experience defines them, makes them who they are.

I refused a long time ago to let Myself and My Life be defined by something I had no control over. Some days I have to try hard to remember that, but it's a work in progress I suppose.

I can't change what they did to me, but I won't give them the Power of holding sway over me for the rest of my life.

Maybe it's Strength..

But it's really more of a driving desire to keep going, despite of everything.

Just so I can send a big mental 'FUCK YOU! HA!! I SURVIVED!!' their way whenever I think about what happened.

Plus all the Boobies here really cheer me up..

01-12-2006, 02:55 PM

Wow girl. Once again you blow me away. I've been pretty forthcoming on some sensitive topics here but once again you lay it all out on the table, not for attention, but so that others may gain support and knowledge from even your darkest experiences. One more little reason why I couldn't let you run away from me.

Mmmmm R*** fantasies. I can honestly see why some guys would be offended, frightened, or even revolted at the idea of their girl entertaining the idea of acting out such a horrific experience. I'm one of those good guy protector types - let no harm come to her on my watch even if it means my death. It seems contradictory that while the R word is a subject so horrible I have difficulty saying it that I'd be turned on by the opportunity to act out elements with my girl. Elements being the key word. I've never acted out a full beginning to end violent R act - I'm not sure if I could. Too close to reality.

It's a fantasy. There's nothing harmful about it so long as the trust is there, the man understands the womans needs and limits 150%, the boundaries are clearly defined, and the man is capable of acting the part as well as directing the act. In other words - it could be very harmful. Great care must be taken. Now I'm the first to say I'm no expert, but I am no stranger to this fantasy.

I've been with four girls that have approached me with this fantasy. Three of them had been R***ed at a young age and the other was just very curious. I gave all of them elements of the R*** experience, wrestling them down, using hateful language, forcing myself into them, etc. Never did I start the sex that way, never did I hit or get violent, and never did I finish under force. Actually no - that's not quite true anymore - but also not the point. This kind of play was never a part of our regular intimacy. I had to quickly learn balance and control and I've had the opportunity many times over the years to ... practice I guess... how to safely deliver one of the most dangerous, delicate and intimate fantasies a woman can have.

As a man - I really dig the fantasy and roleplay. I know how to give it to her when I feel she's ready - and it's ok to tell her no. I know how far to push it so that she gets what she wants without being hurt or scared. I've never had an acted out r*** fantasy turn negative. I understand completely the difference between our fantasy and the reality of what the R word really means. I take the responsibility of being in control of her fantasy very seriously.

That last bit sounds kinda like an advertisement for services

joyslayer · 01-12-2006, 03:51 PM

Wow EPS, I share a similar experience. *hugs*

I was like, 12 at the time, when I was walking to the starbucks, and these guys pulled me into their car, bound a gagged me, as well as gave me these LSD things, I was totally whacked out for god knows how long.
WHen the car stopped, I was heaved out, stripped, and thrown out onto a hard, cold concreter floor. I heard them say stuff about a video camera.
For 2 or 3 days, nightly, they totally destroyed me. All I could hear was the deafening silence, their screams of pleasure, my own screams, or their haunting laughter.
Three yers after, I still get these anxiety attacks.

Me, being myself, I just can't understand the **** fantasies. I just go cold at the thought again. I've been r a p e d by people whome I still love. And its just, creepy, to think of them like that again.