If I were my opposite sex...

For just one day, what would you do?

Personally, I'd dick slap all the hot girls, treat them like crap, bag em and leave them, then go home and masturbate. I might even try anal, just to see if it felt better then a vagina.

[ExistentialDisorder]

it does...

do we get to pick what we look like too?

just one day... hmmm... i'd just be a complete slut. make samantha from sex and the city look like the virgin mary. heh

[WolfMoon]

What?

Why are you disturbing my maturbation for this?

I'd masturbate more.

[Demonista_Ravenesque]

If I were a male, first, I'd go to the zoo and laugh at the elephants because they have really short trunks compared to mine.

I'd then go home and tell my brother *who would be my sister for the day* To go and join 'her' gangsta friends while I invite my hardcore friends who will be male for the day and we will stay at home laughing at Kirstey Alley and egg the Church of Scientology.

After all that, while my friends are asleep because they tired, I'd still go out with my testosterone raging, going crazy and masturbating continuously. The next morning, my friends will find me face down in my swimming pool.

[sensuous0mar]

If I were my opposite sex....
....I'd have a penis.

And I'd probably scratch it in public. I would have no taste or poor taste in everything, and would feel the need to always have sex and then fall asleep.

[Sanctus Dei]

First I'd taken on all the ass holes who cureently treat me like a girl, after I'd solicit sex from all the females who have offered up till now (you have no idea how many) I'd take advantage of my slightly faster burning metabolism and down a pint of ice cream, then burn it off with an hour of crazy frustrating start and stop masturbation just to tease myself. (after which I'd promptly zonk out)

[pitseleh]

I'm afraid I would go down the same sordid road most of the others here. Masturbation, yes, I'd have to try that out... Distracting men while they operated heavy machinery... And possibly allude to some cool girls that "I" had slept with me, and it was incredible.

Not that this in any way reflects my view of women in real life, but I'd probably be kind of a manipulative bitch.

I probably sleep with a lot of women and see what things are like on the male spectrum. Plus if I'm a guy then people wouldn't be weirded out when I hit on a girl!

And play with my package. Hey, everyone else is!

[wild spider]

I'd hit on my gay friend, just because he never gets any action and it would boost his confidence. I'm nice like that... Of course i wouldnt go anywhere with it. That would be curious.....

eeeeew

[Wise Child]

I'd grab a baseball bat, go find the knob jockey I mistakenly went on a couple of dates with last week, and go nuts. Trust me - it'd practically be euthanasia.

[Lady Ravenna]

To be honest...I'd bring pure romance back into the world...find a wonderful girl...romance her with flowers and chocolate and make her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world...

[Queenofdarkness57]

If I were a guy I'd crack my nuts just to make sure if it really hurts or NOT!

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

If I was my opposite sex, I'd be a guy.



I would adjust my sack, OFTEN!! (Mainly because it looks like fun)

I would Pee outside everywhere I could get away with Peeing.

I would ravage all of the Straight Ladies of Gnet, and I do mean RAVAGE!!

I would go to the Zoo and masturbate furiously in front of the Monkey Exhibit, then throw my Spooge on THEM so they know what it feels like.

Everytime I sat down, I would shove my hands down the front of my pants and smile.

I would take Yoga classes just to see if I could suck my own dick.

And last but not least..

I would hunt down every Psychopath that has besieged this site in the last three years, and TEA BAG every last Gawdamn one of them!!!

The End.

[Persephone Hazard]

I'd have to do the whole sex thing, just to see what it feels like for a bloke. I've always been curious! And masturbation, of course, would become one hell of a lot easier, and-so I'm told-more fun.

I'd revel in the fact that I could flirt with women without having to spend hours first subtly working out if they were 'of that persuasion'.

I'd take advantage of my slightly faster metabolism to eat far too much. And I'd enjoy every mouthful without worrying in the way that women do.

I'd pee in public. And take my top off in the street if I got too hot.

[WolfMoon]

I'd also like to vote that I'd pee in public as well. And shake more than a few times.

And who says masturbation would be easier? You'd have a whole different ball-o-wax to get used to down there. That's why practice makes perfect.

[Tall One In Black]

Well, I'm really the odd one out here.

If I were the opposite sex for a day, I'd stay home slightly freaked out that I was stuck in a body that felt really wrong and anxiously await turning back into my correct gender.

But I probably wouldn't feel depressed; that would be a nice change for the day.

[edible_eye]

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

...then burn it off with an hour of crazy frustrating start and stop masturbation just to tease myself....

no you wouldn't. trust me on that one. you'd have to cum or your head would explode or you'd kill someone.

oh, and i'd buy a sybian, squirt some crazy glue onto my labia, take a seat on top of it and crank that motherfucker up to 100 %.

If I were the opposite sex...

I would wake up and stretch while still lying in bed under my silk sheets. I would run my hands over my nakid body and through my hair moaning softly. I would start to touch myself between my smooth legs but then suddenly stop in frustration at my new body's urgent need to pee. Rushing to the bathroom without thinking I'd stand in front of the toilet and proceed to pee down my leg.

After my embarrasing pee experience I'd start a nice hot shower. Once cleaned off I'd find out if the water massager really was worth the extra few bucks I paid for it. When finished in the shower I'd not dry off right away and instead stand in front of the mirror dripping wet and admire myself.

I'd struggle with what to wear but ultimately decide on the sluttiest outfit possible that would still be legal. I'd fight with the stupid bra for about 15 minutes or so before giving up and going without one. After all I only know how to take them off. For shoes I'd try to wear high heels but after falling on my ass twice I'd give that up too and pick some flat wear. On my way out the door I notice my ensemble and how badly it matches - I never noticed things like that before, how odd. With a "Grrr" and a stomp I'd storm back to the room and spend another hour going through at least four different outfits before settling on a basic pair of blue jeans, a reasonably snug fitting tshirt, and some sensible black boots. finally satisfied with my clothing I realize that my hair is a mess and my face is - well just my face.

Feeling frustrated and almost ready to cry I sit down to brush my hair and do my makeup. Which, of course, I have no idea how to do so I start to brush my hair first. Very quickly I realize the benefits of conditioner, which I of course did not use because I was busy masturbating with the shower head. Painfully I engage in the tedious task of working my brush through my snarled hair. Finally after a time my hair is once again fairly straight and shiny though the extra brushing did leave a bit of friz and static. Not to be discouraged from enjoying the experience I move on to the makeup.

Slowely I open the large plastic case marked "Basic Makeup Kit". Mesmerized by the complexity of the array of items, I stare into the case wide eyed and open mouthed. In it is row after row of lipsticks, bottles of goo, colored pencils, strange metal gadgets, pockets of what looks like flesh colored finger paints, and other items that defy description. After poking at some items for several minutes, perhaps even picking some up for closer examination, I realize I have no fucking clue what to do so I close the case and leave the room.

It's now almost noon and not only have I still not left the house but I've failed miserably at every female task I've set out to do short of touching my lovely new breasts. Still, I have a need to go out, show off my succulent self and tease some cocks so I grab my keys and head out after verifying that these jeans do indeed make my ass look big. I wonder what the afternoon and evening will bring?

[Disfunction]

I'd menstruate and vent the rage on unsuspecting males who would tolerate it both because it's a woman thing and because I'd be damn gorgeous. I'd masturbate, have sex, and go SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES!

I asked my boyfriend this question and he said he would masturbate like hell to experience on of our orgasms. I told him he only gets one day, and if he thinks he'd be able to give himself an orgasm in one day as a female, he's not thinking straight.

Gentelmen, it takes sometimes YEARS of sex and masturbation before a woman will experience her FIRST orgasm. And only after all those years of practice will she be able to correctly give herself one. You, as men, BARELY have a clue as to how to get us off. The sheer fact that you mange it now is because A) The girl is helping out with directions. B) You actually manage to find a good spot and dont move from it, like we tell you to or C) She's faking it out of being tired, sore, or pity.

So all you masturbation thinking guys have it so wrong. You'd end the day being frustrated as hell, wet, sticky, and humping your pillow in a desperate attempt to get yourself off.

I don't know that I agree with what you said Geisha, but I am going to do my very best to have dreams of you wet and stickily humping pillows!

[peeves]

I'd wear a trench coat to school so I could pick a fight with the sexist teacher who gets guys in trouble for wearing them but not girls without actually starting said fight. Probibly masterbate at least a little. Pee my name in the snow, and buy a pair of guy pants by myself without getting weird looks or getting told I'm such a nice girlfriend to go shopping for my guy.

[Godslayer Jillian]

I would be so joyous I could wear makeup without my parent's saying anything about it
(I wonder more, what would Ana do if I was the opposite sex for a day?)

[Wise Child]

Originally Posted by GeishaGirl

I asked my boyfriend this question and he said he would masturbate like hell to experience on of our orgasms. I told him he only gets one day, and if he thinks he'd be able to give himself an orgasm in one day as a female, he's not thinking straight.

Gentelmen, it takes sometimes YEARS of sex and masturbation before a woman will experience her FIRST orgasm. And only after all those years of practice will she be able to correctly give herself one. You, as men, BARELY have a clue as to how to get us off. The sheer fact that you mange it now is because A) The girl is helping out with directions. B) You actually manage to find a good spot and dont move from it, like we tell you to or C) She's faking it out of being tired, sore, or pity.

So all you masturbation thinking guys have it so wrong. You'd end the day being frustrated as hell, wet, sticky, and humping your pillow in a desperate attempt to get yourself off.

I wish girls would stop faking orgasm. It ruins it for the rest of us. I absolutely refuse to fake it, because then sex is only for him, and being the selfish bitch I am, this to me renders the whole excercise pointless. I've lost count of the number of times I've had a guy look at me blankly and say something like, "well, every other girl I've slept with has come..."

Sure, sweetheart. If that's what they tell you, then it MUST be true. *yawn*

I revise my answer. If I could be a guy for a day, I'd correct this myth that girls have screaming orgasms as a matter of course and all the guy has to do is clamber on top and hump away like a novice for fifteen minutes. (And the sad thing is, with these guys, fifteen minutes is long enough.)

[ElectricMayhem]

I'd kiss a girl, just too see what it's like.