Will you give your life to Jesus?

[pothead]

I am writing to proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ the only begotten son of God, and to tell you about the prayer of salvation. For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in him should not perish but have ever lasting life. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. You are saved by grace threw faith not by works. Jesus was the lamb of God he died on the cross for you.

Now Jesus had to die for your sin because God says in his word that without the shedding of blood there is no remission for sin, which means there is no forgiveness for sin. Jesus lived a sinless life, and did many mighty miracles he healed many people, and done many good works. Sin is what separates us from God, it is lying, stealing, murdering, anything that breaks the law of God. Jesus died for your sin so that if you believe in him you won't have to go to hell when you die, but will have eternal life in heaven.

Now Jesus died, and was buried in a tomb, but was rose from the dead by God the father on the third day. After being rose from the dead Jesus walked the earth, and preached for 40 days, then he ascended up into heaven to sit on the right hand of God the father. Now That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Now please everyone who want to go to heaven pray with me by using your mouth and speaking pray this with me.

Please Pray ( dear Jesus I believe that you died on the Cross from my sins, I acknowledge that I am a sinner, and I know I can't save myself. I ask you to come into my heart, and save me, and forgive me of my sins. I confess that Jesus Christ is the Lord, I repent of my sin. I accept you as my Lord, and savior I call upon your name Lord Jesus amen) Remember Jesus loves you!!
Now if you prayed this prayer said it out aloud, and believed in Jesus. you are saved, which means you going to heaven.

Also remember Jesus's commandment which is Gods new law, which is love thy neighbor as thyself, and love God with all thy heart, love everybody. Love is what God requires. Also salvation is permanent you can't loose it ever not if you sin, or whatever it doesn't matter how bad you are, you can't get into heaven by being a good person, or by trying to be good, for the bible which is Gods word gave to men to write, says that all have sinned, and that there is none good, but God.

Jesus is the only hope on this earth. Also remember that you don't have to be baptized to be saved, but that is a requirement if you want to follow the Lord.

[CptSternn]

What exactly is the point of your post?

If a person is viewing this thread or any other forums then it means they have Internet access and can easily find out information about whatever religion they choose to with nothing more than a few mouse clicks. Posting this sort of thing here is not helping anyone, nor is it making it easier for people to find out information.

I am offended by this post, even though I am a Catholic, for a few reasons. First off, your spewing the right-wing conservative evangelical rhetoric, which I am no fan of. Whats really offensive though is you obviously think people here need to read your tripe, as we must be godless heathens. Your assertions are offensive to those of us who do believe as well as are a slap in the face to anyone here who holds other beliefs.

You are either a complete eejit, and people like that should shut the fuck up and stay lurking in the corners, OR you knew this would illicit a hostile response in which case you are demonstrating the exact opposite response that any true follower of Christ should be looking for.

Using Christ to start a conflict while at the same time belittling those who you feel are beneath you is not a Christian thing to do and makes you not a Christian, but a dick.

[Grausamkeit]

This thread wishes it were great enough to be called Takei!

[BlacKat]

I did.

He gave it back.

[Grausamkeit]

Originally Posted by BlacKat

I did.

He gave it back.

HAHAHAHA!!! Excellent!

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by pothead

.
Will you give your life to Jesus?
.

I'm not sure I understand the question. Is he wanting to trade?

[Sinjob]

So I'm guessing you can burn in heaven? If that's so I don't mind going to heaven.

[Timeless Rebellion]

Will you give your life to Jesus?:

No, the dude's had two already.

[ape descendant]

Cute story, you may want to work on your delivery though... maybe find a topic that's not so overdone.

[OnyxBat]

Originally Posted by pothead

Sin is what separates us from God, it is lying, stealing, murdering, anything that breaks the law of God. Jesus died for your sin so that if you believe in him you won't have to go to hell when you die, but will have eternal life in heaven.

If I'm wrong, (since I've only read some snips of the bible) doesn't the genesis pretty much say that god gave men (dumb ass didn't add women, so you can't say people in general) freedom to do as they pleased and to own what they want to own and use what he gave them.
So its pretty much his fault that we have sins and we will all be sinners, and if he really did love his creations wouldn't he want to have them next to him instead of hell? And isn't god a lier , he said he loves everyone but he love Jesus more?...

[ZyklonB]

Successful troll is successful.

[Grausamkeit]

This is true.

[Syconycteris australis]

Hey OnyxBat!

Where you been hiding girl?
(tis fruity here - just in case you are too lazy to google me knew name

[Jon Wane]

My religious views have nothing to do with why I signed up to this forum, Mr. pothead.

[Grausamkeit]

Originally Posted by Syconycteris australis

Hey OnyxBat!

Where you been hiding girl?
(tis fruity here - just in case you are too lazy to google me knew name

I knew it!!!

[Vince]

i'll give my life to Jesus if He builds me a hotrod Corvette. M'F'ing Stingray baby! (or ZR-1)

For over a year a little old lady and her daughter came to my house every Wednesday. Which incidentally was my town's trash pick-up day. They, the little old lady and daughter, were hell-bent on me joining their faith of Witnessing Jehova. i politely declined the first time they came by...as well as the countless other times. Had they said Jenova i probably would have accepted their offer.

After the first two months i decided to just ignore them knocking on my door. Like crabs i figured if i just pretend they aren't there they'd eventually go away.

Wednesdays soon became Trash Day, Crazy Church Lady Day, and Death Metal At Volume 11 Day.

i'm not really sure when they stopped coming by on Wednesdays but apparently they decided to give Friday a try. Maybe Friday's would be less Satanic around the old abode.

One Friday last month i get a knock on the door. Since it's not Crazy Church Lady Day i figure it's safe to open the door. FUCK!

She's there all smiles asking where i've been, all the while waving one of those Witness pamphlets in the air and every once in awhile reading something from it. Her daughter is eyeing me suspicously because...ok i'll be honest there's faint sounds of a possible porno playing in the background.

All of a sudden a red wasp lands on the Jehova's Witness Relocation Program pamphlet she's waving around. She says, i shit you not, "Oh look he's trying to get the Word as well!". At which point his wings flare up he makes a b-line (W-line?) right at her and stings her right in the middle of her eyes.

Mother, daughter, and the not-Jenova Witness pamphlet immediately leave my porch and drive away. i haven't seen any of them since.

Man, i love nature.

[Spooky Spencer]

Mormons. Ninjas.

Know the difference.

It could save your life (or your soul).

[Vince]

Around the same time a pair of Mormon guys were snooping around my house as well. They gave me their "Bible"...and said Read it and then pray to God and ask if it the Book of Mormon is true. -_-

i read some of it and after about half of dozen WTF moments in the first several chapters i put it down.

On their next visit i told'em God said No.

[Grausamkeit]

We have had to straight up tell people "Please go away and quit harassing us every week about joining you!" We are not nice to those annoying Sunday door knockers.

[Ben Lahnger]

Vince, I'm gonna have to watch out for you and your wasp minions.

Best stay on your good side.

Hey, ever see "Invasion of the Bee Girls"? Care to hook a brother up?

[Grausamkeit]

Did you say hook? Yes, I think we can hooks you up.

[AshleyO]

Vince, where've you been all my life?

[Vince]

Originally Posted by AshleyO

Vince, where've you been all my life?

i don't normally open up to people especially complete strangers. No matter how many times they tell me that i took too much acid this time and they're really my brother. For realsies. i'm still not buying that shit again....

...anyway i'm going to be honest here.

Remember that one time in Wal-Mart and you thought someone was following you over by the shampoo?

Yeeeaaah, that was totally not me.

i was in Louisiana.

[Tam Li Hua]

*sigh*..

It's always hard to tell if these guys are sincere but misguided, or just trollin'..

Either way, it's no good.