Ever felt...

[Clockwork]

Really alone or separated because you start seeing that people are only variables... simply things that create reactions to whichever way you act? It's taking away anything that makes them human. All I'm seeing is a system or a situation, and I'm the only one here pulling the strings. It's eerie. Of course, thinking this way takes the very point away from even making a post... this will either be ignored or I'll be shunned in some fashion... not that I'm moping, I'm just seeing how obsolete even talking about this is. Eh, I've run enough circles around myself. I'm really paranoid right now though <_<;;

Anyway. Carry on.

[Aude Sapere]

Eh...i've felt lonely before, but not in the way you are describing. Maybe im not old enough yet (16).

[Drake Dun]

You could start a Solipsists Anonymous, but I imagine the members would find all the conversations rather pointless.

Take it a step further and turn those philosophical big guns on yourself. That's an unpleasant experience.

Drake

[Tara Poison]

I hate the way you can feel so lonely even when you're surrounded by people. I get that so much. They all seem to belong and I just... don't, I suppose.
Alone and lonliness sound alike but they are so, so different.
Sucks, huh?
The other day my english teacher said something about that we act differently around everyone else. Loads of people said it was bullshit, that they are the same way with everybody - and I just thought that its like I have a different personality with everyone I know.
And if thats the case then when am I really me?
I'm really confused.

[gothicjokercro]

Originally Posted by Clockwork

Really alone or separated because you start seeing that people are only variables... simply things that create reactions to whichever way you act? It's taking away anything that makes them human. All I'm seeing is a system or a situation, and I'm the only one here pulling the strings. It's eerie. Of course, thinking this way takes the very point away from even making a post... this will either be ignored or I'll be shunned in some fashion... not that I'm moping, I'm just seeing how obsolete even talking about this is. Eh, I've run enough circles around myself. I'm really paranoid right now though <_<;;

Anyway. Carry on.

Hah, someone thinks very highly of themself. If you really understand so much, then you understand that someone else is pulling and yanking strings of the very fabric of society. What makes you think, you yourself are not controlled by a force? With all your mejestry, why are you not coining and controlling the world, and every fabric?! I assure you, that someone will grab your interest and rival you. shit.....

[Clockwork]

@ Aude Sapere: No, I don't think age has anything to do with it. I'm not sure what it is... ah well.

@ Drake Dun: It's not that I'm doubting the existence of anything. I'm just seeing that my relations with people have become mechanical, and I can almost predict the outcome of any contact I make with them.

@ Tara Poison: I guess that shows it isn't just the physical company with people we enjoy, but also the emotional and intellectual. And I know exactly what you're talking about, regarding acting different with different people. I've been analyzing my own behavior amongst others, and I find that I my personality can take dramatic twists. I wouldn't worry so much about which one is 'really you,' however.

@ gothicjokercro: We all give and take a little. We all have effects on society, even slight ones - but not everyone comes to understand their own role and what exactly they can do. It's possible in my case I've fallen into sort of a rut, and things are simplified for me, making it easier to see. If I'm controlled by a force, I suppose it doesn't concern me that much because I'm still acting by my own desires (whether those are artificial or not). You kind of lost me toward the end.

[mrs.wes straker]

Originally Posted by Clockwork

Really alone or separated because you start seeing that people are only variables... simply things that create reactions to whichever way you act? It's taking away anything that makes them human. All I'm seeing is a system or a situation, and I'm the only one here pulling the strings. It's eerie. Of course, thinking this way takes the very point away from even making a post... this will either be ignored or I'll be shunned in some fashion... not that I'm moping, I'm just seeing how obsolete even talking about this is. Eh, I've run enough circles around myself. I'm really paranoid right now though <_<;;

Anyway. Carry on.

Eh, I'm a loner and all for time spent alone, but you sound like you're way too alienated. Are you using? :-(

[HumanePain]

Originally Posted by Tara Poison

I hate the way you can feel so lonely even when you're surrounded by people. I get that so much. They all seem to belong and I just... don't, I suppose.
Alone and lonliness sound alike but they are so, so different.
Sucks, huh?
The other day my english teacher said something about that we act differently around everyone else. Loads of people said it was bullshit, that they are the same way with everybody - and I just thought that its like I have a different personality with everyone I know.
And if thats the case then when am I really me?
I'm really confused.

I can relate to what you are saying Tara. Sometimes I resort to becoming a social chameleon when in new and unfamiliar circumstances where I do not know the etiquette, rules and mores. I think it is normal and actually a survival trait.

[james"bloody tears"]

i have a question, does this make you feel like a puppet master?

[Cen0bite]

Originally Posted by Tara Poison

I hate the way you can feel so lonely even when you're surrounded by people. I get that so much. They all seem to belong and I just... don't, I suppose.
Alone and lonliness sound alike but they are so, so different.
Sucks, huh?
The other day my english teacher said something about that we act differently around everyone else. Loads of people said it was bullshit, that they are the same way with everybody - and I just thought that its like I have a different personality with everyone I know.
And if thats the case then when am I really me?
I'm really confused.

This is crazy! lol..I'm the same way! FINALLY, I'm not the only one! I've felt that way my whole life! This is what has been so great ever since I came into the goth community. I've finally found people who feel the same way I do. It is seriously like someone just took a huge weight off of my shoulders... oh crap..I'm getting all emotional now.. *sniff*

[Drake Dun]

Originally Posted by Clockwork

@ Drake Dun: It's not that I'm doubting the existence of anything. I'm just seeing that my relations with people have become mechanical, and I can almost predict the outcome of any contact I make with them.

Well, it might be a simple as provincialism. Maybe you need a change of social circle, work, residence, or something like that. Some places are worse than others in this regard.

Drake

[Tara Poison]

Originally Posted by Cen0bite

This is crazy! lol..I'm the same way! FINALLY, I'm not the only one! I've felt that way my whole life! This is what has been so great ever since I came into the goth community. I've finally found people who feel the same way I do. It is seriously like someone just took a huge weight off of my shoulders... oh crap..I'm getting all emotional now.. *sniff*

I totally understand. Thats what I love about this site. I put something up the other day about the fact that I'm going to have counselling and a couple of people put up replies and after reading them I felt SO much better.
(Thankx for that by the way, guys)

All hail the amazing powers of Gothic.net.

[thosewhomourn]

I'm not going to go all poetic, but yeah I've felt completely alone before. Heading in that direction right now in fact b/c my best friend stabbed me in the back today. No pity needed, I'm just fuckin pissed about it with no one to talk to about it. You are right about being surrounded by people and not a one of them understands you in the slightest (well, maybe one and then he goes and hurts you when you actually believed he wasn't capable of it).

[HumanePain]

Originally Posted by thosewhomourn

You are right about being surrounded by people and not a one of them understands you in the slightest (well, maybe one and then he goes and hurts you when you actually believed he wasn't capable of it).

I have been married for 23 years, and my wife still doesn't understand me, but she loves me.
In the end I only care if I am loved, and can love back.

[thosewhomourn]

Can't trying to understand and accept someone where they are be a part of loving them? I don't think anyone can understand anyone 100%, but that shows more love than ignoring them or tearing them down.