Wedding Attire Questions

Linen · 04-11-2007, 11:23 AM

I have at least two weddings to attend this summer, one as a regular guest, and another as a bridesmaid. The wedding where I will be a guest is going to be in June, in California, outside. I know it will be hot and mostly likely very sunny, so as much as I'm tempted to wear my shorter black dress with straps, I think I'd burn up in it. Do you think it would be acceptable to wear maybe a dark (lightweight) skirt, and a lighter colored (or at least lighter material) top? They never specified on the invitation as to how dressy it will be. My husband is going to be a groomsman in said wedding (and wearing a suit or casual tux), so for photos I don't want to look *too* casual or out-of-place.

The latter wedding is my best friend's. Myself and one other girl are her bridesmaids (well really bridesmatrons as we are both already married). We've casually discussed dresses, but we haven't looked yet as the wedding isn't until August. This wedding will be indoors in a gorgeous old 1880s Mansion. I'd like my dress to be black, or crimson, or even perhaps a very dark blue or dark green, but the both the bride-to-be and the other bridesmaid say "nay" to black for sure.

The bride-to-be says she doesn't really care what we wear as long as they look nice together, look nice with her dress, and aren't really outrageous. One major problem is that the two of us (bridesmaids) are both very different looking in skin and hair, so we may have a hard time finding dresses in colors/shades that suit both of us. Our other best friend is part Thai, with of course very Asian features - black hair, pale, porcelain-like skin. I have red-brown hair (at the moment, but I dye it a lot so who knows what it will be then), and pale skin with a billion freckles. What do you guys think would look good on both of us? She's pretty preppy so it's going to be hard for us to agree on anything. I definitely want a long dress, and preferably something with a big skirt (not poofy, just not straight), as I refuse to wear pantyhose.

KontanKarite · 04-11-2007, 11:31 AM

Sweetie, I actually went to a wedding in Italy with a mix of bondage and formal attire. It was a traditional wedding too.

For you, I would shoot or lots of lace and sheer material. Yes, the lighter the material, the darker you can pretty much go with the dress.

What's the color scheme of the wedding, might I ask.

Linen · 04-11-2007, 11:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

Sweetie, I actually went to a wedding in Italy with a mix of bondage and formal attire. It was a traditional wedding too.

For you, I would shoot or lots of lace and sheer material. Yes, the lighter the material, the darker you can pretty much go with the dress.

What's the color scheme of the wedding, might I ask.

I don't know the color scheme of either wedding. I don't think my best friend has even thought much about that yet. She's silly. She has her dress already which is regular white as opposed to cream. I believe I asked her a couple of months ago about this and she just giggled and was like, "Color Scheme? Huh... what the hell ever..." She's pretty much a homebody who never wears makeup (save for occasional mascara) or dresses up, so she's kind of lost about the whole thing.

Lace sounds nice. I had thought about that. I just doubt that our other friend will go for wearing lace. She's pretty traditional. Since there are only two bridesmaids we have to at least not clash, and preferably look fairly similar (either same dress - dif color, or same color - dif dress, etc).

KontanKarite · 04-11-2007, 11:58 AM

Lace and sheer, dear. Lace and sheer.

I could imagine a nice white dress, covered in a small layer of white lace around the skirt,white sheer gloves, and a black ribbon laced down the back like a corset.

Go with light colors for your lip such as a white or pale pink and mix with a smokey kind of eye shadowing.

Also, Parasols are your best friend.

Linen · 04-11-2007, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

Lace and sheer, dear. Lace and sheer.

I could imagine a nice white dress, covered in a small layer of white lace around the skirt,white sheer gloves, and a black ribbon laced down the back like a corset.

Go with light colors for your lip such as a white or pale pink and mix with a smokey kind of eye shadowing.

Also, Parasols are your best friend.

All good ideas, save for not wanting to be wearing the same color as the bride. lol

Heatherzilla · 04-12-2007, 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

Lace and sheer, dear. Lace and sheer.

I could imagine a nice white dress, covered in a small layer of white lace around the skirt,white sheer gloves, and a black ribbon laced down the back like a corset.

Go with light colors for your lip such as a white or pale pink and mix with a smokey kind of eye shadowing.

Also, Parasols are your best friend.

You remind me of one of my friends who has somehow ended up as everyones stylist for our school formal thing.

I think you should wear purple but no one ever listens to me. Purple is a pretty colour.

Linen · 04-12-2007, 05:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heatherzilla

You remind me of one of my friends who has somehow ended up as everyones stylist for our school formal thing.

I think you should wear purple but no one ever listens to me. Purple is a pretty colour.

Yes, I love purple!

It's my birthstone color (Amethyst). I don't wear purple clothes often though.

xmorpheus · 04-12-2007, 08:20 AM

Purple for you, lilac for the other gal? There's no rule that says the bridesmaids have to wear identical dresses, provided they fit in with an overall look.

Alternatively, if she's got a kind of oriental look, a couple of cheongsam dresses in different colours would look pretty good - and they're just out there enough to satisfy gothness!

Here's a page with some examples - http://www.chinavista.com/experience/qipao/qipao.html

They're generally ankle length so pantyhose would not be an issue.

For your other wedding, what about your strappy black dress but with a shoulder wrap to protect your skin? very fine lace wraps look very dramatic but shouldn't (hopefully) be too hot?

Linen · 04-12-2007, 08:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xmorpheus

Purple for you, lilac for the other gal? There's no rule that says the bridesmaids have to wear identical dresses, provided they fit in with an overall look.

Alternatively, if she's got a kind of oriental look, a couple of cheongsam dresses in different colours would look pretty good - and they're just out there enough to satisfy gothness!

Here's a page with some examples - http://www.chinavista.com/experience/qipao/qipao.html

They're generally ankle length so pantyhose would not be an issue.

For your other wedding, what about your strappy black dress but with a shoulder wrap to protect your skin? very fine lace wraps look very dramatic but shouldn't (hopefully) be too hot?

Good ideas! The link didn't work though. I talked to my best friend last night (the bride), and she said that she and the other bridesmaid are going to search for gowns this weekend (just to get ideas). I told her my preferences, but I have a feeling the other girl is going to find dresses that won't look flattering on me. Another problem in addition to our hair & skin differences is that I have a much bigger chest (LOL) - she's almost flat, so something that will look good on her might have me all bustin' out at the top. Er.....

Side-note: the bride told me on the phone yesterday, "And I don't want black... this isn't a FUNERAL". I rolled my eyes to this and just sighed. Whatever. Black can be very classy and tasteful, and I've seen plenty of photos of wedding parties where the bridesmaids wore black dresses (I used to work in a photo lab).

KontanKarite · 04-12-2007, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heatherzilla

You remind me of one of my friends who has somehow ended up as everyones stylist for our school formal thing.

I think you should wear purple but no one ever listens to me. Purple is a pretty colour.

I really don't know what to say to that. Hmmm...

sensuous0mar · 04-12-2007, 09:52 AM

Okay dear, here's my 2 cents on the matter (which I hope will be helpful and relevant, since I just helped a friend plan a wedding - that she bailed on...but oh well!)

For the California wedding, I suggest something light (sheer) in 2 layers. Perhaps a dark/jewel toned color underneath like a deep blue or green (or even purple) and a black lace overlay. Probably sleeveless/fairly narrow straps, perhaps tie a black ribbon around your waist with the bow/knot in the back. That will help to dress up the dress or give it a more feminine quality. I actually have a dress similar to this that I wore (without stares or questioning) to a military ball with my roommate Joseph. It will be hot in California but you may have a breeze (depending on how close to the ocean you are) so I wouldn't wear a wrap necessarily...but a parasol would really pull things together and keep you shaded.

For your quest for a bridesmade's dress: I suggest again a jewel tone or deep color. It should flatter both of you, unlike pastels! You can get a different dress in the same color, which I personally like. Then the "preppy" friend can get a tea length dress and you can get one that sweeps the floor. To further match, yet set you apart, I suggest both wearing a black wrap with the jewel tone dress. Hers can be taffeta if she so chooses, and yours a beautiful antique lace.

I hope this has helped.

KontanKarite · 04-12-2007, 10:49 AM

Sensuousasaurus wins the thread. That's an awesome idea.

I didn't really think of much color because I've kinda always seen weddings as white dresses and black tuxes. Hmmm.

Linen · 04-12-2007, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sensuous0mar

Okay dear, here's my 2 cents on the matter (which I hope will be helpful and relevant, since I just helped a friend plan a wedding - that she bailed on...but oh well!)

For the California wedding, I suggest something light (sheer) in 2 layers. Perhaps a dark/jewel toned color underneath like a deep blue or green (or even purple) and a black lace overlay. Probably sleeveless/fairly narrow straps, perhaps tie a black ribbon around your waist with the bow/knot in the back. That will help to dress up the dress or give it a more feminine quality. I actually have a dress similar to this that I wore (without stares or questioning) to a military ball with my roommate Joseph. It will be hot in California but you may have a breeze (depending on how close to the ocean you are) so I wouldn't wear a wrap necessarily...but a parasol would really pull things together and keep you shaded.

For your quest for a bridesmade's dress: I suggest again a jewel tone or deep color. It should flatter both of you, unlike pastels! You can get a different dress in the same color, which I personally like. Then the "preppy" friend can get a tea length dress and you can get one that sweeps the floor. To further match, yet set you apart, I suggest both wearing a black wrap with the jewel tone dress. Hers can be taffeta if she so chooses, and yours a beautiful antique lace.

I hope this has helped.

Wow, awesome suggestions! I may end up making something to wear to the California wedding. For the other, I was definitely thinking dark colors like the jewel tones you mentioned. Colors like amethyst, ruby, emerald, or sapphyre would be nice. Unfortunately, the bride told me that she wants us to wear the same color, but she doesn't care if the dresses are different as long as they are both long. So, we'll see what comes of that. I am tempted to go ahead and go dress shopping with them this weekend just so the other bridesmaid can't pick a color first. The problem is they live an hour away from me, and I'm not sure I feel like driving up there this weekend. (um...why am I always having "problems"? "the problem is..." LOL). I guess I'm not as agreeable as I once thought.

sensuous0mar · 04-12-2007, 10:58 AM

Sensuousasaurus, eh? Rawr!

gulfcoastanthem · 04-14-2007, 05:29 PM

The color scheme for my sister's wedding involved lots of this gorgeous dark purple. I was one of the 12 bridesmaids (WAY too many, in my opinion) and we had floor-length eggplant colored dresses. They looked great on everyone, and we had quite the variety of girls there (pale, tan, tall, short, thin, full-figured...).

So, in terms of jewel tones, dark purple is definitely a safe choice.

Linen · 04-14-2007, 11:23 PM

Well, the other bridesmaid and I have agreed upon a dark red (like burgandy or maroon) color. It will be awhile before either of us purchase our dresses. A friend of mine knows of a girl who is a really great seamstress and might make a dress for me if I want her to. I don't know what she charges yet, but probably not a ton as she is making a faerie costume for my friend in exchange for other stuff. We'll see.

As far as the other outfit, I may make something myself or just keep searching around.