Porn and girlfriends.

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

Egad, sorry...

Thank you

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Originally Posted by Surgeon Méchant De Sang

Egad, sorry...

Thank you

It's okay Hun, I figured you didn't know.

Hence the heads up..

No harm done.

[Manimal]

Originally Posted by Ben Lahnger

Joy, it's the element of concern a person might have that their lover actually covets or craves someone in the videos. You know, as in actually wanting to have sex with a specific human being in the video. Imagining and wanting sex with someone else is halfway to cheating.

Now you and I might be perfectly comfortable with our mates watching porn ...we might all understand we watch it in the abstract, enjoying the bodies and the acts without getting hung up on an individual ... and if our mates have that understanding of us, then all is cool.

But often, insecurity about a partner watching porn means there are insecurities about other things in the relationship. And that is a bigger problem. And sometimes, if the person watching the porn wants the porn more than they want their partner, then it is cheating.

I have a friend in the phone sex business. She has told me first-hand stories about how phone sex has broken up some marriages. Now, phone sex isn't that much different from porn vids, is it?

Phone sex is vastly different from porn. It's the personal involvement. With porn the viewer is taking a passive role in the experience of people fucking on the television. With phone sex you are actively engaged in a sexual act - even if only through words - with another individual. generally most people associate having sex with another person as cheating.

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

Very true Santarea, very true. *Humble Bow To Both Ladies*

Wouldn't it depend on how emotionally invested a person is for it to be considered cheating?

*Wide eyed, curious stare*

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Manimal

Phone sex is vastly different from porn. It's the personal involvement. With porn the viewer is taking a passive role in the experience of people fucking on the television. With phone sex you are actively engaged in a sexual act - even if only through words - with another individual. generally most people associate having sex with another person as cheating.

I don't think the separation is that easy. Yes, you can think of the action involved in phone sex as being more interactive then video, but I think that is an over-simplification. And I think it suggests a misunderstanding about phone sex, as if it is some great interactive experience. There'd be no experience at all if some of these women weren't great actresses. But let me describe two scenarios:

1) Phone sex: I pony up my money and get a girl on the line. She claims to be 5' 10", blonde, 36c and a nympho. She and I have a conversation where she tells me how she's going to let me bake her biscuit and then frost her cupcakes. After enjoying the give and take of an interactive conversation to its logical conclusion, I hang up. I don't know who she is, I may never even be able to get the same woman on the phone again and it's a certainty that she is not 5' 10", blonde, 36c or a nympho.

2) Porn Video: I pay for "Another Blue Movie: part V" starring Jenna Jameson. I watch the video and as it's going on, I imagine baking Ms. Jameson's biscuit and frosting her cupcakes. In this instance, instead of interacting with a voice on the phone contributing new fiction to my fantasy, my disire and passion are driven by the real, live sex I see on the screen. I imagine myself experiencing the logical conclusion with Jenna, and then turn off the DVD player. I think about how hot Jenna Jameson is and plan for the time when I can buy another one of her videos.

Now you tell me, which of those scenarios sounds more like having sex with another person? Which seems more threatening ... more like cheating?

After years of friendship with a woman who works in the phone sex business, I recognize phone sex as just another form of erotica. For example, Anne Rice sometimes writes erotica. Would it be cheating if I commissioned her to write a story about my erotic exploits with a vampire? Why is a phone call where the other party is creating that fiction on the fly in response to my demands any different?

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

I need a job in the phone sex business... I love to talk dirty.

Don't we all!

However ... do not joke about such a thing too lightly.

I may know someone who is hiring.

[Sanctus Dei]

.... what's the pay?

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

I'm not saying it's considered cheating...

Perhaps I was thinking along the wrong lines. I guess what I was trying to say how much emotion has to invested until it becomes dangerous to a relationship...

But no, reading erotica, watching porn, or having phone sex would technically not be called cheating. It's just a form of pleasuring one's self by other means other than one's partner.

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

Wouldn't mind being a phone sex operator either, sounds like it really would be quite a bit of fun... *grin*

[Blushing Heliophobe]

Why don't you just leave if you don't like it here. You're not posting pictures that are witty OR amusing and you have nothing intelligent to say. You obviously don't like people here. So just leave.

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

.... what's the pay?

Are you over 18? Do you live in the United States? Answer those two questions for me and I promise I will check on the pay rate today.

To share what I know now, the best money is paid to women who can keep a guy on the phone for hours (no small feat, I promise you.) I've watched my friend work (which has sometimes been very much fun, and sometimes a bit troubling.) I know that the challenge of keeping a man intrigued and excited without getting him over-excited too quickly is an art in itself. And she has to be very creative ... it's not enough to just know a bunch of dirty words. She has to use her imagination to fill in the blanks in a wide variety of fantasies and fetish scenarios. One of her current main clients (he's called her for years) is a huge enema fanatic, so she is always scouring the web for new enema erotica to inspire her. She says it's very difficult to keep coming up with ways to make the phone calls sound fresh.

Originally Posted by Surgeon Méchant De Sang

Wouldn't mind being a phone sex operator either, sounds like it really would be quite a bit of fun... *grin*

Maybe ... some of the women my friend has worked with do seem to enjoy it much. But as with any other sex-related work or entertainment, there is a danger that it can affect you in undesireable ways. This would definitely not be the same thing as talking smutty to your boyfriend. And it's important to note that in a way, when you do this work you are captive to the caller's fantasy. So it's much more like work than you would initially imagine.

However, I bet if you were just setting about the business of recording aural erotica, using your own fantasies. it would be smoking hot! There are websites out there where women read/act out their fantasies, and people pay the site membership to download the WAV files. Now that sounds intruiging, provocative and downright sexy!

[Ben Lahnger]

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

- One of my favorite porn stars died on this day. She is one of my favorites not for what she did onscreen, but for what she was like offscreen. And she did not die from drinking, drugs, HIV, sexing herself to death, suicide, or any of the other self-inflicted dooms you expect for someone associated with that industry. On a small 2-lane road outside of Las Vegas, she was the passenger in a car that was making a u-turn when another car crashed into her vehicle. Both drivers survived with minor injuries. Due to the narrowness of the road, and the near constant construction, it is reported that 17 people have died on that stretch of road since July 1, 2005. It's so senseless, and I for one am saddened that a wild and joyous spirit has left this world too soon.

You can read a little bit about this at the website with her name.

Rest in peace, Anna Malle.

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

If you're speaking to me Heliophobe? Because If I offended you, then I'm sorry. I haven't tried to make anyone angry.
I apologize If I wasn't blessed with smarts, or wits, or any funny pictures to post for anyone's enjoyment.
To be honest, I like here quite a bit, and I do like alot of the people here quite a bit as a matter of fact, and I like seeing what they have to say.
Once again, I'm sorry that I've offended you.

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Sweetie, she wasn't talking to you.

She was speaking to the troll Cornelius Scipio who has been plaguing the site with their pathetic nonsense the last few days.

You should be able to see the disabled posts right above and below her reply to him/it.

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

Okay, thank you, looking for it now...

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

Apologies to Heliophobe, and please disregard the previous two posts...

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

They may only be visible from my side.

Not sure..

She was responding to this:

Cornelius Scipio
The administrator has decided that Cornelius Scipio should be quiet for a while.
View Post Old Yesterday, 02:33 AM
Cornelius Scipio
The administrator has decided that Cornelius Scipio should be quiet for a while.



He has been banned now, so you may not be able to see his posts that she was responding too. The above is just one example of his pathetic attempt at trolling.

Hope that helps clear up the confusion. No harm done..

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

That picture is disgusting...

I did catch a couple of posts that he made, but it was only through quotes that people had taken from his quotes. Not exactly the most couth human being to walk the planet.

I would say that the troll had some major issues.

[Sanctus Dei]

Ben darling... Born and bred in the US of A all legal and ready to start a new "career"... *grin* I really am curious though as to what a girl could get paid to help out the lonely..

[Ben Lahnger]

Follow-up report:

Anna Malle dead at 38

(warning: some topless female nudity at above link - not work safe - not for underage viewers)

Anna Malle, who appeared in about 350 adult movies, died yesterday in Las Vegas. The car in which she was a passenger was hit by another car.

The Clark County Coroner's Office confirmed that the woman known legally as Anna Hotop, 38, was killed in the crash, which occurred off State Road 160 near Rainbow Blvd., and that an autopsy would be performed today.

Sources believe her car was hit by a drunk driver. The suspect is currently in custody.

Malle joined the industry in 1992 after being discovered via a swingers' group. She is pictured (at the above link) flanked by Jill Kelly (l.) and Christi Lake on the September, 2000 cover of Fox Magazine. The accompanying pictorial featured Malle as the fiery wild girl, Kelly as the malt shop waitress, and Lake as the cheerleader.

Roy Karch directed Malle in numerous movies.

"Anna Malle was one of the true great wild women of all time," he said. "As wild as she was on camera, she was as nice off camera. Just having her in the movie was a plus. She was bubbly and fun and sweet; one of the last few girls who really enjoyed her job in this business. She lived it and loved it."

Former AVN editor Rebecca Gray remembers Malle auditioning for Los Angeles theatre roles at the height of her porn fame. "She had a lot going on," Gray said, "and people really liked her."

Malle joins Linda Lovelace, Julie Robbins, and Britney Madison in the ranks of actresses who have recently died in car crashes.

----------------------

There is a phenomenom where some of the more recognized female pornstars do some escorting at a high dollar price (from $1000 to $5000 per hour for the top names) ... a chance for die-hard fans to live out their favorite pornstar fantasies. I had read about that and read the reviews from people who had partaken of this "hobby". Hands down, the one who really liked to have a good time and wanted her partners to have a good time was Anna Malle. There are some things I will never do in this life, like joining the mile-high club, or paying money to sleep with a pornstar. But in this instance, if I was ever going to pursue such a thing, it would have been with her.

She was a woman who really enjoyed living, and all the appetites that come with it. It was just lucky for her that she stumbled into a career that fell in line with her desires. She has been called the "Mae West" of porn, and that really fit her to a "T".

Okay ... enough about that ... except: Damn fucken drunk drivers!

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

Ben darling... Born and bred in the US of A all legal and ready to start a new "career"... *grin* I really am curious though as to what a girl could get paid to help out the lonely..

Well, I admire your philanthropic spirit!

I actually have an e-mail in to my friend asking about this. She is away on a trip and I try not to call her on her business line when it's not something urgent. So I'll update you as soon as I hear something back, okay?

[Blushing Heliophobe]

Aaargh!!!!!

Okay, I am asking for some advice pretty-please.

Imagine a couple that would like to enjoy adult movies together. One of them only likes straight porn and doesn't like anything but - anything else and there's no party in these pants. One of them likes gay porn; straight porn turns this partner way off. Compromise seems like non-deal; arousal is seriously halted by straight porn for one and gay porn for the other.

What to do?!?

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Well, what about a Flick that includes Both?

Wouldn't that satisfy both partners?

If it's straight for one, and girl on girl for the other we're talking about, I bet Ben could reccommend a few titles with both elements. Ben is our resident porn aficionado.

But That way it would be mutually inclusive for both parties.

Just a thought..

[Blushing Heliophobe]

Yup, yup, this is the case - straight porn for one/girl on girl for the other.

Ben - any ideas? We're at a halt!

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Blushing Heliophobe

Yup, yup, this is the case - straight porn for one/girl on girl for the other.

Ben - any ideas? We're at a halt!

How about using two TV sets?

This is a challenge. The easy answer is to find a vid that features boy-girl-girl scenes, but the problem is that the scenes usually don't end up being a hybrid of two styles. Instead what you will get is a period of a couple of minutes where the two women are engaged with each other and the guy is passively watching (which will only be exciting for one of you). Then when the guy gets involved, he will typically start switching off between doing one woman and then the other. At this point, the interaction between the women is limited to some caressing and kissing. This part will probably only be exciting to the other one of you.

What would be ideal would be a video full of MFF daisy chains. This would be where a guy is doing a girl while she is eating out the other girl.

Tricky ... let me see what I can find.