Damn family dinners

Minyaliel · 12-25-2008, 07:48 AM

My mum´s a huge fan of charity. So she´s throwing a big charity dinner for the most unfortunate of our relatives. Then she suddenly became sick last evening, puking all over the place. I told her we should postpone the dinner tonight until later, when she feels better. But her damn altruism denies her to do so, and now I have to feel responsible for the whole damn thing. I have to entertain the guests, I have to cook, decorate and nurse her. Only thing is, I have nothing in common with these people - I hardly know them, and some of them are in such a condition mentally that conversations with them are nigh impossible. One´s had a stroke, and thus is mentally down on the level of a seven- year old. Especially this guy is one of my main problems. He is pitiable, for sure, but damn it, he stinks, is rude and can´t keep a conversation. Yeah, sure, he´s sick, but so is everybody, it seems. I just want to throw in the towel and tell them all to go to hell. I´m no hostess, never been, never will be. Why expect something like this of me? I´m not made for such interactions. There´s a reason why I hardly talk during family get- togethers. I don´t get them, they don´t get me. Can´t we just keep it like that?

I am really discomfortable with this. My nerves are so tense you could use them to cut cheese with. I don´t want to. Please. Keep me out of your affairs, mother, please.

Wrath · 12-25-2008, 08:08 AM

To bad you cant just be like me and just make a statement "I'm here to cook that does in no way require me to talk to you"

Be thankfull its only for one night then its over.
You really dont have to talk to anyone just help your mom out and be honest to her your under no obligation to talk to anyone..and it sounds like your pressuring yourself more than your mom is just relax its her problem not yours.

Necrophagist · 12-25-2008, 08:23 AM

Fucking spoilt.

HumanePain · 12-25-2008, 10:15 AM

Tell mum you don't feel well either.

Underwater Ophelia · 12-25-2008, 10:38 AM

Is it that hard for you to show basic politeness for one night?

Steppenwolf · 12-25-2008, 10:56 AM

Just one night is ok , but mothers use an alternative numerical system .
If she doesn't feed you , you don't have to do it . It's as simple as that .

Tam Li Hua · 12-25-2008, 11:09 AM

If you are running around taking care of the party, I doubt anyone's going to expect you to stop and make idle conversation.

I agree with Wrath, too; don't put so much pressure on yourself. At least it's for a good deed, and isn't that what Christmas is all about?

Minyaliel · 12-25-2008, 12:42 PM

You might think of me what you will, I don´t care. The story of my family is one of abuse and poverty, and no one of us seem to be able to stomach each others´ presence or stay under the same roof more than four days without having at least two serious fights. Spoilt? Hardly. I´m only at home because, living under the established poverty limit, I just couldn´t afford to stay at the student housing this holiday. But of course, you guys can´t know this. The whole affair tonight irks me because of the open hypocrisy. I´d rather prefer to take each of the guests to a café or something, or see them regularly, rather than helping my mother relieve her bad conscience toward them in the holiday season only, helping her feed her superiority complex. If I had the cash and lived in this city, I would care for the people. Just not all of them at the same time; I can handle a one- on one meeting without fainting of exhaustion afterwards.

Argh, I´ve never liked Christmas. If I had a family that could stand each other, I would be lobbying for Midtvintersblót instead. :P

Sanguine Heart · 12-25-2008, 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Minyaliel

You might think of me what you will, I don´t care. The story of my family is one of abuse and poverty, and no one of us seem to be able to stomach each others´ presence or stay under the same roof more than four days without having at least two serious fights. Spoilt? Hardly. I´m only at home because, living under the established poverty limit, I just couldn´t afford to stay at the student housing this holiday. But of course, you guys can´t know this. The whole affair tonight irks me because of the open hypocrisy. I´d rather prefer to take each of the guests to a café or something, or see them regularly, rather than helping my mother relieve her bad conscience toward them in the holiday season only, helping her feed her superiority complex. If I had the cash and lived in this city, I would care for the people. Just not all of them at the same time; I can handle a one- on one meeting without fainting of exhaustion afterwards.

Argh, I´ve never liked Christmas. If I had a family that could stand each other, I would be lobbying for Midtvintersblót instead. :P

Trust me, I know how you feel about not connecting with family, on my dad's side I always feel akward, because I don't see them too often, so they always ignore me. I feel out of the loop.

On my mom's side, most of my family is nice except for my Grandmother, I Fucking HATE her. I'm nothing but nice to her, yet she's constantly trying to turn everyone against me. Then when I try to defend myself, she tells everyone that I'm yelling at her, and "Verbally abusing" her. Everyone can see that's not true, but they always take her side, because "She's old".

Necrophagist · 12-25-2008, 04:06 PM

Grandparents are only worth the amount of money they give you.

$haDe · 12-25-2008, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Necrophagist

Grandparents are only worth the amount of money they give you.

That's too mean for your grand' !!

Tam Li Hua · 12-25-2008, 09:20 PM

Do what I usually did during that time: Stay with friends, and be -very- strict with your folks about only visiting them at certain times, and establishing boundaries with folks you don't like to be around.