dating a "Non-goth"? - Page 5

Mir · 04-12-2009, 01:02 AM

Because of our evolved consciousness?

Cicero · 04-12-2009, 01:08 AM

Our evolved consciousness hasn't quite overcome our inability to have sex with those we perceive as hideous.

Perhaps some people overcome it in favour of 'inner beauty', good for them, but as a whole we're still a very superficial species.

Mir · 04-12-2009, 01:23 AM

"but as a whole we're still a very superficial species. " - That should have been your answer to Duane.

Cicero · 04-12-2009, 01:35 AM

I prefer my answer, thanks.

Mir · 04-12-2009, 01:52 AM

People will try to rationalize everything.

Solumina · 04-12-2009, 11:49 AM

Attractiveness is not purely based on physical traits, people can be just as attracted to a bubbly personality as to an ample chest.

Mir · 04-12-2009, 01:24 PM

Boobs don't do anything for me. It is weird, and I'm definitely in the minority here.

Saya · 04-12-2009, 01:26 PM

What about legs, Mir? :3

Mir · 04-12-2009, 01:33 PM

Not particularly, no. I dig women that can play an instrument, though.

Duane · 04-12-2009, 01:37 PM

Bass, must play bass. If they play guitar, that's fine too.

ZyklonB · 04-12-2009, 01:38 PM

I like small to medium boobs myself. I don't think I've ever dated a girl with a cup size over B. Wait let me think... nope, I haven't.

Denchera · 04-12-2009, 01:42 PM

It doesn't really matter for me either, as long she's Gothic and her face is Ok.

Godslayer Jillian · 04-12-2009, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cicero

as a whole we're still a very superficial species.

By whose standards? It's who we are. Forcing us to disregard looks for something in which looks matter is just another way of kidding ourselves.

Underwater Ophelia · 04-12-2009, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

By whose standards? It's who we are. Forcing us to disregard looks for something in which looks matter is just another way of kidding ourselves.

I agree, and to expand this idea, I think the true superficiality wouldn't really be having standards, even high standards, but completely disregarding other factors in the hunt for physical sex appeal.

Cicero · 04-12-2009, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

By whose standards? It's who we are. Forcing us to disregard looks for something in which looks matter is just another way of kidding ourselves.

That's exactly what I was saying before. Physical attractiveness is important to everyone whether they like it or not, and a lot moreso than most people would like to think. Even babies prefer pretty faces.

RozzVanian · 04-12-2009, 09:59 PM

Yeah, it's not a pretty truth, but it sure is true. I just cannot be attracted to someone on a sexual basis if they're butt-ugly. Even if they have a great personality. Now, I'm not saying they need to be pretty as a picture like Scarlet Johannson, but I need to find them physically attractive.

I hope there are some goths at my home school. That would make my year. All I seem to see are those Paramore emo kids, which I despise.

Mr E Nigma · 04-12-2009, 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RozzVanian

Now, I'm not saying they need to be pretty as a picture like Scarlet Johannson, but I need to find them physically attractive.

Scarlet Johannson in the movie "The Spirit"

....DAYUMMMM!!! Just sayin'..

Yeah the whole physical appearance thing isn't really superficial. I know plenty of people who have dated men or women I personally wouldn't have found attractive. And I myself have found attractive women that my friends wouldn't have found attractive.

A person a lot of people might find unattractive could be considered quite the opposite to another group of people. I honestly believe in the saying, "Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder." And I don't just believe that because I play D&D and get owned by beholders a lot. Everyone has some sort of quality that other people would find attractive. Some moreso than others, but statistically speaking, I'm pretty sure not many people die virgins, (and that's excluding people who have gone to hookers).

And sometimes, it just depends on the country you live in. There could be some blonde hair blue eyed nerd living in Wyoming where everyone hates him, but he goes to visit japan and all of a sudden the girls are all over him.

It just depends...

Cicero · 04-13-2009, 01:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

Yeah the whole physical appearance thing isn't really superficial.

But it is superficial in that it only involves what's on the surface. That doesn't make it a bad thing though, because it's just one of many factors that influences attraction and as you said is very subjective.

The rest of your post I agree with.

RozzVanian · 04-13-2009, 01:47 AM

Animals are attracted by beauty, it's just how we are. Even in the animal kingdom, you got birds with tufts of feathers that they extend to attract mates.

Saya · 04-13-2009, 08:54 AM

Its true, which sucks when you have to tell a guy no. Like there's this one friend who is awesome, don't get me wrong, but I'm in no way attracted to him. He is overweight and already has confidence issues, I feel like the worst person in the world when I have to tell him no -_-* Doesn't help that he gets all whiny about it, either.

Underwater Ophelia · 04-13-2009, 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cicero

But it is superficial in that it only involves what's on the surface. That doesn't make it a bad thing though, because it's just one of many factors that influences attraction and as you said is very subjective.

The rest of your post I agree with.

It doesn't just involved what's on the surface, though.
If you have nasty hair, you likely don't shower.
If you're way too skinny, it's because you don't eat enough.
If you have gummed up eyes, it's because you have some sort of eye infection.

Those things aren't hot, and I sure as hell don't want to mate with that person.

Mr E Nigma · 04-13-2009, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cicero

But it is superficial in that it only involves what's on the surface. That doesn't make it a bad thing though, because it's just one of many factors that influences attraction and as you said is very subjective.

The rest of your post I agree with.

Superficial... Yeah I guess that's true.. For some reason I think I was confusing superficial with shallow in that regard.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

It doesn't just involved what's on the surface, though.
If you have nasty hair, you likely don't shower.
If you're way too skinny, it's because you don't eat enough.
If you have gummed up eyes, it's because you have some sort of eye infection.

Those things aren't hot, and I sure as hell don't want to mate with that person.

Yeah but all those things are sill qualities of a person that would be quite apparent on the surface, nothing deep or mentally intuitive yet. So it's still superficial, ya know. I agree though, one might jump to unnecessary conclusions just by looking at a person, but your feelings are still judged by what you obviously see.

Saya · 04-13-2009, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

Superficial... Yeah I guess that's true.. For some reason I think I was confusing superficial with shallow in that regard.

Yeah but all those things are sill qualities of a person that would be quite apparent on the surface, nothing deep or mentally intuitive yet. So it's still superficial, ya know. I agree though, one might jump to unnecessary conclusions just by looking at a person, but your feelings are still judged by what you obviously see.

I think what Ophie means is that there is a reason we judge by that sort of thing. Not dating someone because they aren't supermodels may be superficial, but dating a greasy stick of a person with huge bags under their eyes and bad BO, while they may be a wonderful person for health reasons it may be best not to sleep with them.

Or from an evolutionary standpoint, they might not be able to provide for you or give birth to healthy children.

Underwater Ophelia · 04-13-2009, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

Superficial... Yeah I guess that's true.. For some reason I think I was confusing superficial with shallow in that regard.

Yeah but all those things are sill qualities of a person that would be quite apparent on the surface, nothing deep or mentally intuitive yet. So it's still superficial, ya know. I agree though, one might jump to unnecessary conclusions just by looking at a person, but your feelings are still judged by what you obviously see.

That's not necessarily true.
Any of those things could indicate a serious mental problem.

Underwater Ophelia · 04-13-2009, 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saya

I think what Ophie means is that there is a reason we judge by that sort of thing. Not dating someone because they aren't supermodels may be superficial, but dating a greasy stick of a person with huge bags under their eyes and bad BO, while they may be a wonderful person for health reasons it may be best not to sleep with them.

Or from an evolutionary standpoint, they might not be able to provide for you or give birth to healthy children.

I didn't mean for health reasons.
I mean, that's A reason, but not the most pressing one.

Save for extenuating circumstances, in a modern country, a person has no reason not to be hygienic. If he or she isn't, it's because something is wrong.

Example: I used to be friends with a girl who would come to school without having showered for a week in clothes that her cat had pissed on.
She wasn't poor, her pipes weren't broken...she just had some serious self-esteem (and other) issues.