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General General questions and meet 'n greet and welcome! |
11-03-2009, 07:47 PM
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#76
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Gallifrey
Posts: 2,817
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I remember once when my mother told me to go outside and get something out of her truck at about ten PM-"but watch out for the man!" she said.
'What man?"
"The Man under the truck."
Since that moment I've been terrified of some lone Man-note, it's Man and not man-waiting in the dark, under beds, in closets, under cars, and in my back seat-for me.
At least my mother thought it was fucking hilarious.
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11-05-2009, 10:54 AM
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#77
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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My parents used to tell me that I was no different than the other children to comfort me.
And when my guinnea pig died, my mother told me that it's soul had flown off to the heavens. Then when I ran to the window to see it off, she told me it went too fast for us to see :P That was kinda cute.
Also, when I was a child, I was kinda sneaky. Everyone had been telling me that Santa Claus came with small presents at night every night from December 1. to December 24.
So one night, I proudly declared that in order to see santa, I was gonna stay up all night.
My parents - panicking as what to do - decided to tell me one of those small lies that will really make you doubt their integrity and honesty later on.
That's right, they told me that Santa wouldn't come if I wasn't sleeping.
So sneaky as I was, I laid down pretending to sleep, because I really wanted to see Santa! Then my dad came in to check if I was sleeping - probably because he was about to put the presents in the christmas socks. I must've had my eyes halfway open or have moved or something, because his cunning surpassed that which I had, so he told me that Santa would also know if I was only pretending to sleep, and that if I didn't go to sleep for real in about 10 minutes, he wouldn't come at all.
I used a solid 10 seconds to wrap my mind around this and find a way out.
I decided, that the best way to ensure getting my presents AND having a shot at seeing Santa was to go to sleep and hope to wake up at the right time. This never succeeded though.
This little lie resulted in something harmless, yet slightly annoying.
The night of which they told me this, I got performance anxiety though and almost didn't make the magic 10-minute mark of Santa's grace, thereby almost missing my small presents that day!
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11-06-2009, 02:55 PM
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#78
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Stalking Noel Fielding
Posts: 93
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My mum told me the ice cream van played the music when it ran out of ice creams.
On speed dial on our phone due to lack of space a friend is listed as Foster Home, when the kids play up it has been known to select the number and threaten them with calling the foster home to come and collect them.
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11-06-2009, 03:40 PM
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#79
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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Reading through this thread just brought back the most hilarious memory that I had totally forgotten about.
When I was about 3, my mom used to make this pasta out of seashell noodles, that had cheese, tomato and onion in it...I was somewhat of a picky eater back then and refused to eat anything with white things, or red things.
So my mom made up this huge elaborate story, that she got the pasta recipe from a mermaid who had secretly told her that if you ate it, it would give you the capability to be a mermaid whenever you wanted...and that mermaid girls ate it all the time (btw at this age I was obsessed with the little mermaid, and the movie splash, I wanted to be a mermaid so bad) She convinced me, but in the back of my head I wondered why the heck a mermaid would pick something so nasty to eat...and why I didn't turn into a mermaid afterwards....
horrible lies!!!
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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11-06-2009, 04:05 PM
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#80
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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My father once convinced me, that I had been drinking some bad milk, and he made it sound like poison to the stomach, so the only antidote was a diet coke.
I panicked, drinking this horribly tasting diet coke, believing that it had just saved my life.
Later, I realized that it was probably a poor attempt at getting me to drink diet over sugar.
Irony has it that today, I can't drink sugar coke, I only drink diet.
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11-07-2009, 01:56 AM
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#81
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sheffield UK.
Posts: 2,065
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I don't drink Coke products at all. It tastes like the blood of dead Union Leaders. =D
__________________
Avoid all needle drugs - The only dope worth shooting is Richard Nixon.
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11-07-2009, 02:01 AM
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#82
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 96
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My mom told me girls liked guys who wanted to remain abstinent.
Silly mom.
Edit: You know, that sounded way less creepy in my head.
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11-07-2009, 02:13 AM
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#83
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4,036
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My mother told us -me and sister- that if we don`t cut our nails, little baby crocodiles will grow under them.
__________________
"I've an idea. Why don't we play a little game. Let's pretend that we're human beings, and that we're actually alive. Just for a while. What do you say? Let's pretend we're human. Oh, brother, it's such a long time since I was with anyone who got enthusiastic about anything."
― Jack Osborne
add me on
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11-07-2009, 08:37 AM
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#84
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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My mother just used to tell me that they would grow, curl and start cutting through the flest on the very same finger that the nail had grown out from.
She managed to get an explanationproblem when I saw the man with the world's longest nails on TV..
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11-07-2009, 02:57 PM
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#85
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Ingary
Posts: 145
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My mom would sneak into my room at two in the morning and read all the texts on my phone. I was twelve then. What a bitch.
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11-07-2009, 02:59 PM
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#86
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovelyxBlackLace
My mom would sneak into my room at two in the morning and read all the texts on my phone. I was twelve then. What a bitch.
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Well congratulations, almost all parents do that. But this is hardly in the spirit of the game, now is it? Reading your text messages is hardly a lie.
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11-07-2009, 03:00 PM
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#87
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4,036
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anarasha
My mother just used to tell me that they would grow, curl and start cutting through the flest on the very same finger that the nail had grown out from.
She managed to get an explanationproblem when I saw the man with the world's longest nails on TV..
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She used to tell me about toe nail, that they do that... But I guess those do... Hmm
I`m not really sure xD
__________________
"I've an idea. Why don't we play a little game. Let's pretend that we're human beings, and that we're actually alive. Just for a while. What do you say? Let's pretend we're human. Oh, brother, it's such a long time since I was with anyone who got enthusiastic about anything."
― Jack Osborne
add me on
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11-07-2009, 03:03 PM
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#88
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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I suppose those will grow upwards and poke your eyes out!!11! :o
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11-07-2009, 03:06 PM
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#89
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Ingary
Posts: 145
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anarasha
Well congratulations, almost all parents do that. But this is hardly in the spirit of the game, now is it? Reading your text messages is hardly a lie.
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Yeah I know. But it's a violation of privacy and it's really just equivalent to lying, when the people you're supposed to trust do this behind your back.
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11-07-2009, 03:06 PM
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#90
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4,036
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No =S
http://www.footfirst.com/images/ingrown.jpg
This shit exists
According to Wikipedia, it can happen to finger nails as well, so your mom wasn`t completely lying.
__________________
"I've an idea. Why don't we play a little game. Let's pretend that we're human beings, and that we're actually alive. Just for a while. What do you say? Let's pretend we're human. Oh, brother, it's such a long time since I was with anyone who got enthusiastic about anything."
― Jack Osborne
add me on
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11-07-2009, 03:07 PM
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#91
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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It still does not fit the thread no matter the reason.
/discussion
And Geo - I know, but it was just to fit the theme of nail lies :P
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11-07-2009, 03:10 PM
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#92
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4,036
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OMG why am I even searching this
OUCH
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Vandenbosbefore.JPG
Tell me another lie so I can search that and forget about this one..
__________________
"I've an idea. Why don't we play a little game. Let's pretend that we're human beings, and that we're actually alive. Just for a while. What do you say? Let's pretend we're human. Oh, brother, it's such a long time since I was with anyone who got enthusiastic about anything."
― Jack Osborne
add me on
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11-07-2009, 03:44 PM
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#93
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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TV will make your eyes square!
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11-07-2009, 08:22 PM
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#94
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,274
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That guys never make passes at girls who wear glasses. (B-U-L-L).
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11-08-2009, 11:34 AM
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#95
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 526
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I was obsessed with long hair, so my Mom could get me to eat anything by saying, "It'll make your hair grow."
__________________
"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"
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11-16-2009, 01:51 AM
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#96
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Thou Viking capital Denmark.
Posts: 1,971
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My mom didn't want me to have long hair, so she told me that my hair was too thick to grow long, and so she kept on trimming my hair for many years.
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11-16-2009, 02:22 AM
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#97
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Beautiful Gardens
Posts: 268
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Here's a lie my mother told me:
"I'll trim your hair"
Well she did, but not in the way that we agreed, at all...
Last edited by Krick Wurkheiser; 11-16-2009 at 02:22 AM.
Reason: fix error
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11-17-2009, 07:09 PM
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#98
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 526
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Oh, God. I wouldn't let my Mom near my hair. My sister nagged my Mom about cutting her hair, and she looked like a poodle.
__________________
"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"
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11-17-2009, 09:04 PM
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#99
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Beautiful Gardens
Posts: 268
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Back in Makedonija, my mother's mother cut mom's hair by placing a bowl on her head and trimming around...
My mother is fine at a straight trim, but anything more complicated goes out the window (though she cuts my dad's hair ok)
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11-18-2009, 04:13 AM
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#100
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 1,044
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I wasn't lied to about it, but when I was a child I was not allowed to grow my hair long.
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